


Citadel Five-0

by synergy



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: AU, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-10-18
Updated: 2012-10-18
Packaged: 2017-11-16 13:44:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/540079
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/synergy/pseuds/synergy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The trouble starts when his partner Garrus Vakarian goes on vacation and Detective Kaidan Alenko finds himself evading the wooing attempts of John S. But is John a petty criminal, a persistent stalker or is he the prime suspect in Kaidan’s latest case?</p><p>Mass Effect Big Bang 2012 Entry<br/>With art by silvermittt</p>
            </blockquote>





	Citadel Five-0

Art by [silvermittt](http://silvermittt.deviantart.com)  


 

 

 

[Case File: 03412B]

[Evidence no. B734-N]

 

The footage was grainy, from a spy cam that was placed there in a hurry. But John S. was still recognizable.

 

It was in the way he stood, casual and yet his posture was perfect. As if even years after, his military training was still very much a part of his character.

 

He checked his omni-tool for the time and resumed his watch of the doors to the warehouse.

 

It was an old warehouse but still very much in use. Crates of eezo mixed with arms and even the occasional red sand. Citadel had more restrictions than any other place, but the criminals had carved their own special place in it.

 

The Citadel was a beacon of light to many, which made it all the more desirable for the undesirables. One of its more desirable citizens had just walked through the warehouse's doors. Although, to be honest, Donovan Hock didn’t really live there. Still, he had a vast network and most of his dealings happened on the Citadel.

 

Hock was wearing a suit, something expensive, cut to perfection. He was flanked by two bodyguards, both of them turians. Two other bodyguards, both of them trigger-happy krogans, were guarding the doors.

 

In his sleeveless jacket, sleeveless shirt and cargo pants, John was severely underdressed.

 

John straightened, losing the casual look. He was more soldier than criminal now. More trained killer than petty crook. “Mister Hock.”

 

“How are the shipments?”

 

John motioned towards the crates on the far side of the warehouse. “First two arrived yesterday. The third one’s arriving tomorrow at 0800.”

 

Hock made a deep, guttural sound. It was clear that he was displeased.

 

“Something wrong, sir?”

 

“I heard there were...problems. With one of the shipments.”

 

John straightened, an unreadable look on his face. His jaw tightened for a brief moment before he relaxed, a blink or you miss it moment.

 

“That’s why you hire professionals for this kind of job, Mr. Hock.”

 

“I hear C-Sec is curious. I also hear that their Customs department have forwarded the case to Investigations.”

 

“It’s on Bubin’s desk,” John said, easily.

 

“Bubin?”

 

“That’s, ah, his nickname, sir. It’s the name of Blasto’s partner, from the new movie,” John scratched his neck, looking a little uncomfortable at his slip-up. “That’s what the C-Sec officers call him. His name’s Alenko.”

 

“I don’t care what his name is. Are you on this case or not?” It seemed Hock’s patience was at an end.

 

“I’m working on it, sir. He won’t be a problem.”

 

“See to it that he isn't. I don’t want any mistakes. Do you hear me?”

 

“Relax, Mr. Hock. We’re all professionals here.”

 

“You’re lucky your boss thinks highly of you. Or I would’ve taken my business elsewhere.”

 

The threat made John change his stance from parade rest to attention. The look on his face shifted from his usual carefree but bored look to one that promised violence. “I guess it’s a good thing that I don’t work for you, then.”

 

Hock paused, still visibly angry but there was tension in his shoulders, as if he realized a line had just been crossed. “Just get the job done,” he snapped, turning around to leave the warehouse.

 

His two turian bodyguards left first, quickly followed by Hock. One of the krogans looked at the other and shook his head. It took another moment before he exited the warehouse. The krogan who lingered by the door had heavy facial scarring, not unusual for krogans, but it made him easier to remember.

 

“See you around, Wrex.”

 

The krogan snorted but nodded his head. “Don’t get dead, John, or whatever your name is.”

 

John chuckled as Wrex closed the door behind him.

 

It was quiet, for the moment. John waited for a few more beats before leaning against one of the crates, staring at the entrance.

 

“How long have you been shadowing him for?”

 

His question was met by more silence but John could be patient when he wanted to be. Sure enough, something moved in the shadows. The camera captured the drell’s back, though he was still partially hidden in the darkness.

 

“A while. I’m a patient man.” There was no inflection in the drell’s voice. No indication that he was upset or even amused. He sounded quite peaceful.

 

John nodded, smiling easily. “So I’ve heard.” Silence reigned for a while before John spoke up once more. “I’d like to renegotiate your contract.”

 

“I’m afraid that would not be possible.”

 

“Oh, I don’t know. I think your client wouldn’t mind.”

 

“You are certain of this, are you?”

 

“Check your omni-tool,” John said, pointing at the man’s wrist. Sure enough, there was a barely audible beep, signaling a new message. John waited patiently as the message was read and turned to look when the light from the omni-tool’s interface died down.

 

“I was told that we would be working together.”

 

“Yes. Don’t worry, I’ll stay out of your way. All you have to do is make sure that Hock stays alive long enough to get those shipments over here.”

 

“You have a plan, I take it?” There was a shift in the drell’s voice. A hint of curiosity and something more, possibly suspicion.

 

John’s lips curled into a smile that would have done the Cheshire cat proud.

 

“You can say that.”

 

[End File]

 

 

 

 

Kaidan looked at the paperwork in his in-basket with despair. Ordinarily, his workload was hefty but manageable. With his partner out of action due to familial obligations, the hill now resembled a mountain.

 

He heard a soft sound of distress from behind him and turned to look at his turian partner in desperation.

 

"Are you sure you can't postpone your trip, Vakarian?"

 

"You'll miss me that much, Alenko? Could've sworn just last week you were ready to toss me into a cell for breaking regs." Garrus tossed what looked like a case file on his desk. Probably just finished, with lots of details missing, as usual.

 

Kaidan snorted. "That was before your sleuthing nabbed us Thalid. I might actually propose this time, just so I could come with you."

 

"You'd hate Palaven. Too many turians and far too warm. You dainty humans couldn't stand it. Not to mention, you might faint."

 

"You won’t be catching me?"

 

"I'll let the floor do that."

 

They exchanged grins, this play-by-play being part of their routine. True, Kaidan had been apprehensive about their partnership at first, but he knew what he was getting into when he joined C-Sec.

 

His by-the-books way and Vakarian's shoot-them-in-the-knee style made their partnership seemed like something out of a Blasto movie. Garrus got off easy, he took the “Blasto” nickname with his turian brand of smugness and said, “I’ve always wanted to be a Spectre.”

 

But Kaidan? He had to deal with people muttering “badassfully” and calling him 'Bubin' whenever he wanted to say something. He took care of that nonsense with some well-timed biotics—who knew Chellick was acrophobic—but he had a feeling that people still made elcor jokes whenever he and Garrus were out of earshot.

 

In the end, their mutual dislike of injustice made them fast friends. They didn’t necessarily hang out after work but they didn’t need to. They worked perfectly even when their personal and work lives didn’t mix.

 

“So what _are_ you doing for a month, Garrus?”

 

“You know, the usual. Pick on my sister, worry about my mother and argue with my father. And when I get bored, I’ll shoot random criminals.”

 

“And have the local law enforcement write up the paperwork?”

 

“Of course. Can’t have them getting rusty.”

 

“Well, good luck with that, Vakarian,” Kaidan said, saluting.

 

“Will do. Hold the fort while I’m gone?”

 

“You bet. Without you bypassing all the red tapes, I can actually do the paperwork without any creative editing,” he shouted as Garrus walked out of their shared office space, chuckling all the way to the end of the corridor.

 

 

*

 

 

The troubles started days after Garrus’ departure. There were rumors of a new smuggling ring on the Citadel, which meant the existing criminals were more volatile than usual. With only three people investigating, Kaidan soon found himself spending more and more time at the office.

 

Anyone else would have their social life take a nosedive but Kaidan barely had one to begin with. If he were honest to himself, he’d say that this new development was a welcomed change. He hated to be reminded that he barely had friends outside of C-Sec.

 

He was reading a report and contemplating this when he heard the commotion outside. Most of the other investigators had gone home by this time. The night shift started two hours ago and, any other day, Kaidan would already be home.

 

Still, he couldn’t help but step outside of the office to check. Haron was standing in the hallway, muttering under his breath.

 

“What's going on, Haron?”

 

“Caught some human causing a ruckus at Chora's Den. Bastard's putting up a hell of a fight.”

 

“Who's holding him?”

 

“Some of the new recruits. Everyone else has gone for the night.”

 

Kaidan tried not to sigh. "I'll put him in stasis so you guys can drag him into one of the cells."

 

"Be careful, Detective. He's a biotic as well."

 

"I'm an L2, Sergeant. I can handle myself."

 

Kaidan really had to stop jinxing himself. If Garrus had been there, he’d have made a smartass comment about underestimating the criminals on the Citadel.

 

As it were, Kaidan couldn’t really say that he was completely surprised that when he checked the interrogation room window and saw that one of the few salarian officers they had was lying unconscious on the floor next to the door, next to him was Eddie Lang, who was groaning in pain. One turian was pinned to the wall with biotics and the other turian was being used as a chair. The biotic who caused the chaos sat in the middle of the room, practically humming with power.

 

He visibly perked up when Kaidan walked through the door. The expression on his face switched from “New victim!” to something predatory. Actually, no, it was something that was closer to, “oh, look! Shiny!”

 

Kaidan rolled his eyes and wished he brought a tranq gun with him as well. Or that Garrus was there with him. Because Garrus was like a turian version of a tranq gun.

 

“I see you’ve been causing quite the chaos. Mister?”

 

“John, call me John,” the man said, leaping to his feet. The recruit he’d been using as a chair let out a grunt and rolled over, groaning. “And you are?”

 

“You can call me Detective Alenko. Right after we formally charge you with disturbing the peace, obstruction of justice and assault on a C-Sec officer.”

 

Kaidan took a moment to assess the man in front of him. He was about Kaidan’s height, dark hair shaved short. He had a sly smile, the kind that said that he knew all your secrets but won’t tell you what he’d do with them. It was his eyes that made Kaidan falter for a moment. They were an interesting shade of blue.

 

He had to mentally shake himself into focusing because the man was still a biotic who took down several C-Sec officers without breaking a sweat.

 

“I’ve had a very long day, John. Are you going to make this harder for me or will you cooperate?”

 

Clearly, it was the wrong thing to say, judging from the way the smile on John’s face twisted into a smirk. Something closer to a leer, really.

 

Great.

 

“And by harder, I mean more difficult,” Kaidan added, when John opened his mouth to say whatever line he wanted to say.

 

The moment Kaidan spoke, the man visibly wilted, looking annoyed. “I had a line, you know. A really _great_ line that I wanted to use.”

 

“I’m not here to amuse you,” he stopped, before he said “John” again. “What’s your surname, anyway? I have to address you properly.”

 

John raised an eyebrow at him. “You’re in a room with a powerful biotic who just took down your co-workers and you’re still going by the book?” He gave Kaidan another assessing look. “You know, I think I like you.”

 

“Your name, sir.”

 

John shrugged. “People call me John S. But you can call me whatever you want.”

 

“I, uh, _what_?”

 

Did he just...

 

“What’s a good looking guy like you doing working for C-Sec, anyway? You could be a model. Or a poster boy for the Alliance,” John paused, looking at Kaidan’s ass--was this guy serious?--with a leer. “With an ass like that as an incentive, they’d have all the recruits they need.”

 

It was a good thing that Kaidan patience was practically legendary, because “John S.” was seriously putting it to the test. He was still contemplating whether or not to use his biotics to put an end to this conversation when the door opened. Kaidan shifted so that his back was towards the wall, making sure that he could see John as he saw Haron hesitating by the door.

 

“Alenko?” Haron called from the doorway. “His ride is here.”

 

“What? It’s only been an hour since he was arrested. Not to mention he assaulted these C-Sec officers,” Kaidan said, gesturing to his fallen colleagues. Well, actually, he probably should have called for the medic before he attempted to question the perp. Damn. Alone for a day and already he was slipping.

 

“My client was harassed by your colleagues. It was self-defense,” another voice said. Kaidan didn’t even need to turn around, already shaking his head in disgust.

 

When he finally mustered enough self-restraint not to push John S. against the wall, he looked towards Collins--legal council to most top tier criminals on the Citadel.

 

“I didn’t know you take pro-bono cases, Collins.”

 

“I don’t. He’s a very important client.”

 

Collins smiled like the shark that he was. If Garrus were here, he wouldn’t even dare show that face. Collins didn’t think much of Kaidan, though. Then again, he’d never seen Kaidan in action. Still, there were regs and if Collins was here for John S, then Kaidan couldn’t keep him.

 

It was the way that Citadel worked and it was one of the reasons why, despite his personal preference to follow the rulebook, he would look the other way when Garrus broke a rule or ten during a case.

 

“Tell your client to stay out of trouble.”

 

“Well, now, if being in trouble means I get to see you, Detective Alenko, I might have to get in trouble more often,” John said with a wink, even as Collins shoved him out of the room hissing,

 

“Move. Your boss wants to see you.”

 

Kaidan and Haron watched quietly as they left.

 

“That’s going to be trouble,” remarked Haron, before calling for the medic to come and get today’s casualties.

 

 

*

 

 

The problem with being a part of C-Sec meant meeting different people and there were a lot of people out there who seemed to like him. He made it a rule that he wouldn't date anyone he met through work. Unfortunately, being a part of C-Sec's investigation unit meant that he didn't get enough time to socialize. Which in turn meant that anyone he met was usually through working capacity.

 

It was fine in terms of friendship but his love life took a pretty big nosedive after his promotion into the investigation unit. This was a well-known fact, unfortunately. Kaidan kind of missed his days in Enforcement. At least then he had a life and could actually date.

 

That was why, when the flowers arrived, people noticed.

 

It was a big bouquet of stargazer lilies, which happened to be his mother's favorite. They were also notoriously difficult to obtain on the Citadel, which meant they were crazy expensive.

 

When he arrived at work, the rumor mill was already in full swing. He was uncomfortable by the knowing looks from his turian coworkers but he was getting stares from the salarians and the cute asari, Lena, whose office was just next door.

 

In fact, when Lena saw him and smiled, Kaidan felt his mouth beginning to dry and he managed a grin before he nearly slammed into Chellick.

 

"Watch where you're going, lover boy!"

 

He couldn't help the blush, thinking that Chellick was making fun of him for smiling back at Lena. He was calling Chellick some unflattering names under his breath but then stopped because he saw the vase.

 

"Who would..." his voice trailed off as he noted the voice card. Picking it up, he pressed play.

 

"Hey there, Kaidan!" John's voice, far too cheerful, made him groan. "Can I call you Kaidan? I'm going to call you Kaidan."

 

Kaidan shook his head and said, "No, you can't call me Kaidan," even though John wasn't there and the recording kept going. He pressed stop before the message was finished, head throbbing. He just hoped that it wasn't another migraine.

 

“So, who are they from?”

 

Kaidan’s gaze turned to the doorway where Lena was hovering. “They’re very pretty,” she said, moving closer. “A very expensive gift. Someone must really like you.”

 

He tried to give her a smile, though judging from her reaction, he must have looked more constipated than anything.

 

“I...take it you don’t like flowers?”

 

“It’s not the flowers that I’m worried about,” he confessed. “It’s the person who sent them.”

 

“Oh,” she said, quietly, moving closer to look at the bouquet. She gave him a glance, an unspoken question. The moment she saw him nod, she reached out and touched one of the petals. “They're very beautiful. I would love to visit Earth one day, just to see the flowers there.”

 

“They’re a bit rare nowadays. Kind of a luxury, really. We have them in nature preserves, parks where we keep most of our floras and faunas, and some people have started farming them,” he could have gone on and on, but he realized just how _boring_ it all sounded. When he looked at Lena, it was clear she wasn’t paying any attention to what he was saying. Desperate to find something else to focus on, he looked back down at the voice card. He had to stop this little game of John’s before it escalated.

 

With that in mind, he knew exactly what he was going to do with those flowers.

 

 

*

 

 

The caseload on his desk was slowly diminishing, though there was one case in particular that caught his interest. Smuggling was fairly common on the Citadel, like on every other city, really. This particular case was different, though.

 

For one, smuggling cases tended to stay with the Customs Division, annoyed whenever one of their cases get routed to Investigation. From the looks of things, this case was sent directly to his desk. So, this particular case either involved new weaponry or possibly a large quantity of drugs.

 

Either way, it would be a messy one and Kaidan disliked smuggling cases in general, even with Garrus around. Still, if someone made the effort to actually send this through to him, he might as well read it.

 

At first, the case looked normal enough. Some weaponry smuggled in with dextro foodstuffs from Omega. It should be an open and shut case. Except for the part where the smuggled weapons seemed to have mysteriously disappeared from the warehouse. From a C-Sec controlled warehouse.

 

“Great,” he muttered, closing the file.

 

It was either going to be another one of the merc groups, possibly Eclipse, or something even worse. The file also came with a tip by one of their usual informant. There was another strange shipment in the warehouse district, possibly the same kind as the one that was missing.

 

“I guess I’m not having dinner again tonight,” Kaidan said, already dialing up Bailey to pass on the info.

 

 

*

 

 

“It’s quiet.” Kaidan cringed, realizing how cliched he sounded. Beside him, Bailey didn’t seem to mind.

 

“Too quiet, if you ask me. Usually means trouble in these parts.”

 

One of the junior officers had scanned the warehouse and found it empty, with the exception of all the goods inside. It was really Harkin’s job but he made some excuse about being too busy with another case after Bailey had filled him in on the details. Kaidan knew for a fact that he only had one case that week and someone else had closed it for him. Humans like Harkin made Kaidan’s job harder but at least there were plenty of other humans working for C-Sec who made up for most of his failings.

 

“You checked your info, Detective?”

 

If anyone else were to ask him that, Kaidan would probably be annoyed. However, Bailey was a different case. Kaidan knew that he probably was asking for the sake of asking and not because he was questioning Kaidan’s judgment.

 

They were both humans working for C-Sec after all, they knew all too well that the turians who worked for C-Sec tended to look down on their human co-workers.

 

“He’s our usual guy, so we know his information is good.”

 

“How did you get saddled with a Customs case, anyway?”

 

Kaidan sighed before looking at Bailey with a wry smile. “You don’t want to know.”

 

Bailey made vague noise, waving his hand. “Suit yourself.”

 

“To be honest, I’m a little confused myself,” Kaidan said, slowly.

 

“Why is that?”

 

“Well, this is an awful lot of guns we’re talking about. I mean, even with the ones seized, anything we find in there would amount to…how many?”

 

“Well, enough to take down the Citadel, that’s for sure.”

 

Kaidan paused as a sudden chill gripped him. Before he could talk it over with Bailey, a voice went through the comm lines, “Detective, we’ve got confirmation.”

 

“Looks like it’s time to head inside,” Bailey said, pushing himself off the wall.

 

“Still doesn’t make any sense why it isn’t guarded,” Kaidan said. “Did you check for mech activity?” he said to his comm.

 

“Yes, sir. We have negative on that.”

 

Even with that confirmation, Kaidan wasn’t about to tempt fate. He took out his heavy pistol, nodding at Bailey who did the same.

 

“I’ll take point.” He said, moving towards the door.

 

 

*

 

 

He stepped out of the warehouse without waiting for Bailey. Despite the information and their source, nothing checked out. The crates were empty and they just wasted an entire evening and C-Sec resources for a failed bust.

 

Kaidan wasn’t even worried about the fallout, he was more worried that either their informant was giving them false information or someone found out about their operation. Which would mean they had a mole in C-Sec.

 

His mood was already foul when he looked up and saw they had an audience. Mostly warehouse workers but he caught sight of a reporter setting up her cam. He scanned the crowd for more reporters and instead found something even worse.

 

He gritted his teeth and marched over to the crowd, stopping right in front of the man in question and pointed at his face.

 

“You. Come with me.” He didn’t bother looking back to check if he was followed as he marched over to an alley he saw earlier. When he was far enough away from the crowd and prying eyes, he turned around to glare at John S who was smiling like a maniac.

 

He was too close to the light, though, where the crowd could still see him. Kaidan yanked his arm, dragging John along towards the shadows.

 

"What the hell are you doing here, John?" he hissed, slamming him against the wall.

 

"Did you get my flowers?"

 

"Did I?" Kaidan spluttered. "You show up in the middle of a bust and all you can say is 'did you get my flowers'? Really, John?"

 

But instead of appearing properly chastised--and really, why did Kaidan even bother thinking that John was going to make his life easy?--John kept right on talking and smiling.

 

"I heard that you buy that flower all the time. So I figured that must be your favorite flower."

 

He was lying, Kaidan knew it, because Kaidan only bought lilies on Earth. He couldn't afford them otherwise.

 

"I gave them away," Kaidan replied, and he couldn't help the satisfaction he found in seeing the way John's face fell at that declaration.

 

"What! Why would you do that?"

 

"I donated them to the maternity ward at Huerta Memorial. The nurses there thought it was a sweet gesture," Kaidan went on, casually, before sealing it with, "I even got myself a date with one of them as thanks."

 

It was good to see John sputtering this time. Kaidan didn't care if that made him petty. Garrus always said that small victories would win the war and Garrus was once in the turian army--the best military in the galaxy--so he’d trust Garrus’ judgment on this. Besides, these victories were pretty damn satisfying.

 

“Kaidan, wait!”

 

“That’s Detective Alenko to you,” he said, lips thinning as he glared at John.

 

“Look, I’m sorry about the flowers.” John stopped and rolled his eyes. “That must be the first time ever that I’ve had to apologize to someone for giving them flowers,” he said, though he quickly continued when he saw the scowl on Kaidan’s face. “I just think you’re interesting and I’d like to get to know you. Over dinner.”

 

“How about I don’t arrest you and you leave me alone instead?”

 

“How about coffee?” He must have sensed that Kaidan was about to say no because he went on to say, “One hour. Just give me one hour over coffee. If you still think I’m not worth your time then I won’t bother you anymore.”

 

Kaidan hesitated. On the one hand, he really didn’t want to meet John during his free time. On the other hand, this might be his only chance to get rid of the pest for good. The investigator side of him rolled his eyes and pointed out that John was a criminal, one with influential friends. Besides, sending flowers to C-Sec investigators was probably his idea of fun.

 

“No deal,” Kaidan said, shaking his head and he had to resort to glaring when John was about to protest. “Get the hell out of here before I arrest you.”

 

John sighed as Kaidan stepped away, though the look on his face turned faintly amused.

 

“You won’t be able to keep me there for very long, Detective Alenko.”

 

“Just because you have some influential friends doesn’t mean that I can’t make your life extremely difficult.”

 

“Fair enough.” John said, walking back towards the street. “This doesn’t mean that I’ll give up, Detective.”

 

Kaidan fumed silently, even as he heard a chirp and saw John’s omni-tool light up. He couldn’t hear much, as John’s pace switched from a saunter to a brisk walk. The last thing he heard before John was too far away for him to hear was the name Cerberus.

 

 

*

 

 

It escalated.

 

The lilies were bad enough but then John started leaving other gifts. Chocolates, books--actual paperbacks--and even a very nice bottle of Peruvian whisky that Kaidan had been reluctant to part with. Still, he couldn’t accept gifts from a known criminal, no matter how good looking the man was.

 

That was the problem, really. It was utterly frustrating that these gifts just kept on coming and that none of the C-Sec investigators knew how John was able to leave them on Kaidan’s desk. Kaidan had a strong suspicion that John was either bribing the cleaners--which meant C-Sec needed to redo the background checks on these guys--or he snuck in when no one was around.

 

He didn’t know which explanation was worse, at this point.

 

The next present that came was delivered by the man himself. Kaidan was taking a break by the Wards access, trying to figure out what lead to chase on his smuggling case. Later, he’d curse himself for not being aware of his surroundings. The Citadel might be safer than Omega or even Illium but attacks on C-Sec officers weren’t unheard of. The fact that Chellick had casually mentioned that the crime rate had gone up in the last month and the projections stated that it would continue to rise didn’t help matters. Today it might be reports of an increase in smuggling attempts but tomorrow it could be the murder rate.

 

“Is this what you do during your lunch break? Sit around and brood? Or are you thinking about that ad?”

 

It was a good thing that Kaidan was so used to unexpected things that he didn’t jump out of his skin. He turned his head to gaze at John, who sat next to him and stared at a billboard that proclaimed in bright neon lights that there was a sale on ladies undergarments. The same billboard that Kaidan had apparently been staring at, unseeing, for the past fifteen minutes or so.

 

Kaidan liked to think that he could wish away the flush that was slowly working its way up from his neck. From the way his face was heating, he didn’t think it was likely.

 

“Thinking of buying something for the wife or girlfriend?”

 

“No wife. Or girlfriend,” Kaidan replied, “And before you ask, not for myself, either.”

 

John chuckled. “I wasn’t going to ask, but thanks for clarifying.” He shifted in his seat to look at Kaidan. There was a dangerous look in his eyes. Not the kind that promised explosions or death, though. The kind that said that Kaidan was going to regret not having his lunch at his desk as usual. “So no significant other, huh? Good to know. Now I know for sure that I won’t have to hold back.”

 

“Hold back? Hold back on what?”

 

“On my attempts to win you over, of course,” John replied, as if Kaidan had just asked if the Salarian Union had weekly coffee dates with krogan warlords or something equally ridiculous.

 

“Do you take Red Sand?” Kaidan asked. It wasn’t what he wanted to ask but it would certainly be an excuse as to why John S was doing this, aside from the thrill of driving a C-Sec investigator insane. “Are you using? Is that why you’re like this?”

 

“I’m pretty sure that I have more productive things to do than sit around in my underwear, staring at the wall.”

 

“Some people can still be productive. Crazy, but productive. Which is what you are, apparently.”

 

“Crazy about you, certainly.”

 

At that rather obvious line, Kaidan couldn’t help but laugh.

 

“Did you just use a line on me?”

 

“I don’t know. Did it work?”

 

“No, it didn’t. Feel free to test it out again at Flux, though. Multiple times.”

 

John didn’t seem offended, he just shrugged his shoulders as if to say, “what can you do?” He did get up after sending yet another one of those frustratingly amused looks.

 

“I hate to love you and leave you,” he said, ignoring the way Kaidan choked at his words, “but I have things to do.” He stretched his whole body and Kaidan stared idly at the way the muscles on his bare arms move. “Oh, and here you go,” he tossed a small box at Kaidan, who caught it with his biotics before it could hit him in the face. “A little something for you, since you didn’t appreciate my flowers.” Before Kaidan could protest, he waved his hand and walked away.

 

Kaidan stared down at the box in his hand, shook his head and headed back to C-Sec HQ. He dropped the box by the evidence lab and muttered something about potential explosives or poison.

 

At the end of the day, he received a message from the guys at the lab.

 

“Thanks for the chocolates, Alenko.”

 

Kaidan stared at it for a moment and re-read it.

 

“Huh.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan wasn’t sure what to make of the marigold. All of the other flowers that John had sent had been predictable. Lilies, roses, tulips, and even daisies.

 

There was even a note to go with it, a note made of actual paper. Kaidan hadn’t opened it yet, holding it in his hand as he stared at the bouquet.

 

But then Lamont knocked on his door, a datapad in hand. “Hey, Alenko, I’ve got,” he paused, eyes widening as he stared at the flowers on his desk.

 

For a moment Kaidan wondered if Lamont wasn’t aware of the inter-office gossip. He was pretty sure that all of C-Sec knew about Kaidan’s not-so-secret admirer. He was even summoned to the Executor’s office for a talk about bribery that made his blood boil before Pallin explained that it was standard procedure and that he knew Kaidan would never accept.

 

“Interesting flowers, there,” Lamont said, voice even. He looked like he wasn’t sure whether to feel sorry for Kaidan or laugh.

 

“Not my choice, I’m afraid.”

 

“Yeah, I heard all about your admirer.” Lamont tilted his head, “Although, now that I’ve seen what flowers he’s been sending, I’m starting to wonder if he’s admiring you or making fun of you.”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“Those are African Marigolds.”

 

“Ah, sorry, I don’t follow.”

 

Lamont shrugged. “My parents are botanists, used to drag me everywhere. I’m not a specialist when it comes to alien flora, but I’m pretty good when it comes to Earth flowers,” he shook his head, “Anyway, most flowers have meanings, right?”

 

“Right,” Kaidan said, drawing the word out, clearly stating that he wanted to know where this was going.

 

“Well, I might be wrong but I’m pretty sure the guy who sent those is saying that you’ve got a dirty mind.”

 

“He’s _what_?”

 

“African Marigolds. Vulgar mind.”

 

Kaidan was silent for a moment, then he looked down at the card in his hand. Slowly, he opened it. It read,

 

_Roses are red,_

_Violets are blue._

_Asari are sexy,_

_I want to bone you, too._

 

He quickly closed it, placed it right in the middle of the bouquet and then shoved the entire thing into the trash can. When he looked back at Lamont, his colleague had a hand over his mouth and his shoulders were shaking.

 

“I think that the sender is delusional. Clearly, these flowers should have been for him instead.”

 

“Clearly,” Lamont managed to choke out before he stumbled out of Kaidan’s office.

 

“I’m going to kill him,” Kaidan said to the empty space, refusing to look at the bright orange flowers that he could still see from his peripheral vision.

 

 

*

 

 

Clearly, John had switched tactics. Instead of trying to impress Kaidan, he was now trying to infuriate him instead. Which meant all sorts of presents and antics that made Kaidan either horrified--honestly, edible lube? Ridgefield was in hysterics--or just angry.

 

Kaidan would file for harassment charges when John actually managed to grab his ass while greeting him one day but no one saw the actual grabbing. Plenty of people did see the way Kaidan slam John face-first into his desk. Not that it did much to deter John, who made a comment about bringing out the handcuffs and, “didn’t know you liked it rough, Detective.”

 

He was lucky that Kaidan only threw him out of HQ. Of course, it still meant another trip to the Executor’s office. This time it was a rather stern lecture on “not following Vakarian’s footsteps,” or so Pallin said.

 

When he arrived at his office the next day, there was a box on his desk. He’d be wary of its contents if he didn’t know that anything delivered to C-Sec were run through multiple scanners before they were delivered to someone’s desk.

 

Of course, this was before he opened the rather innocent-looking box. It was a tactical error on his part, despite knowing what John was capable of, Kaidan clearly wasn’t fully prepared for just how far John was willing to take this.

 

It was unfortunate that Lena was there, dropping off some files on Donovan Hock as well as some crucial data that their informant managed to obtain on Hock’s business dealings. Lamont had stopped by because he heard from the security guys that Kaidan had yet another present, or so he said.

 

Kaidan didn’t know what possessed him to open the box while the other two were in the room with him but it was too late. He lifted the lid and found himself staring at the content. Nestled between layers of white wrappings was a dark blue vibrator.

 

“Oh, asari-made. And very, um, realistic,” Lena said, taking a step forward. Kaidan noted that her cheeks were darker than their usual color and that while she hovered, she made sure not to move too close to the desk.

 

Lamont, on the other hand, was leaning against the doorway, shoulders shaking, laughing into his fist.

 

It was this that made Kaidan realize that the screeners would’ve known what was in the box. Which meant that Lamont probably had a good idea what the content was before he decided to stop by. He hadn’t even realized that he was starting to glow until he heard Lamont stammer out an excuse and Lena left the room. He slammed the lid back down on the box and tossed in the the trash can.

 

As he sat back down, he thought of all the ways that he could kill John for tormenting him.

 

 

*

 

 

John had the actual nerve to show up right before Kaidan was about head home. Kaidan’s first reaction was to take the box with his “present” and threw it at John’s head. It was too bad that John was a biotic himself and stopped the box before it could do some damage.

 

“You didn’t like it? But I was so sure you’d like the size!”

 

“You’re lucky that I’m C-Sec and I’m actually not allowed to kill you or maim you.”

 

“Oh, come on, it was completely harmless!” John didn’t even have the decency to sound sorry.

 

Kaidan gritted his teeth, whirling around to point his finger at John. “Listen here, you!”

 

“John,” John said, unhelpfully, grinning like the _idiot_ that he was. “My name’s John, Detective Alenko.”

 

“I know damn well what your name is. It’s written on every single package that’s been delivered to my desk for the past two weeks. It’s on every single card attached to all the bouquets that I’ve been getting. And it will be the name that’s written on a restraining order that I’ll be making!”

 

“Actually, according to C-Sec rules, I’m not breaking any laws. You can file a complaint about the harmless--”

 

“Sexual harassment,” Kaidan supplied, dryly.

 

“--flirting but you know as well as I do that if you really want me out of your hair, you’d find a way.”

 

“I’m pretty sure that’s what I’m trying to do right now.”

 

“Come on, Kaidan, you’re curious. Admit it.”

 

“It’s Detective Alenko.”

 

“Right,” John shrugged. “Well? How about it, Detective?”

 

“You’re not going to back off unless I say yes to that date are you?” Kaidan asked, crossing his arms to his chest and glaring at John. He took a step back to lean against his desk.

 

John nodded, moving in closer to place his hand on Kaidan’s desk, staring at him. “Think about it. You’ll only have to put up with me for two hours in a public setting. And if you’re still not curious, I’ll back off completely. No more visits, no more presents, and I’ll leave you alone. How’s that?”

 

It was a tempting offer. If anything, his stress levels would probably go down, no more migraines. Not to mention the public humiliation would stop and he’d stop being the butt of everyone’s jokes. He could handle all the Bubin jokes but any jokes about his non-existent love life wasn’t something he needed to hear.

 

“Fine,” he ground out.

 

“Great! Meet me this Saturday, around noon at that new coffee shop at the Presidium,” John began walking towards the door, looking quite pleased with himself. It made Kaidan want to throw him out. “Don’t be late!”

 

With a flare of his biotics, he tossed John out, feeling slightly better when he heard John yelp in surprise.

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan caught a break on his case a day later when Donovan Hock’s ID was flagged when he entered the Citadel. Hock tended to stick to Berkenstein, where he ran most of his business. Records indicated that Hock had been to the Citadel earlier, a month ago. He came by for a very short visit, just over two hours.

 

Kaidan sent in a request to have Hock taken in for questioning, mostly for that visit. Those types of visits would always show up as a red flag for C-Sec—the average visit length was around four hours, any short visits that were undeclared were regarded as suspicious—and they were well within their rights to question him. Unfortunately, even though he got a green light on having Hock taken in, Pallin refused to let him interrogate Hock.

 

“But, Executor, this is my case.”

 

“I’m well aware of that, Detective Alenko. However, you lack the experience of interrogating difficult suspects.”

 

“Garrus and I do it all the time!”

 

“Exactly so, Alenko. You and Vakarian do it together. I’m afraid I’m going to have to ask you to defer this Detective Chellick.”

 

And so, the matter was closed. Chellick would interrogate Hock while Kaidan watched from the monitors.

 

Hock was agitated, he’d only been detained for a couple of minutes and already looked ready to bolt. They had to act quickly, before his lawyer got there. Kaidan could only hope that Chellick would be able to get them something useful before they ran out of time.

 

“Our records show you came to the Citadel a month ago, Mr Hock,” Chellick asked, his tone was easy, conversational.

 

Being around him at C-Sec, it was easy to forget that Chellick did undercover work. He could easily adopt a new attitude should the need arise for either good cop or bad cop. Not a bad deal, Kaidan had to admit.

 

“Yes. Last I heard that wasn’t a crime. Which, incidentally, is what this is. Holding me against my will.”

 

“I’m afraid I have no clue what you’re trying to say, Mr. Hock. You’re here because we wanted to verify your identification.”

 

“You could’ve done that without dragging me into this interrogation room. Now, just tell me what’s this about.”

 

“You’re a businessman, correct?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“You are in the armaments business?”

 

“Yes. I sell guns. Now get on with it.”

 

“Do you often sell guns to buyers on the Citadel?”

 

Hock leaned forward, his smile was sharp enough to hurt or maim someone. “I sell guns to all kinds of people. I’m even sure that I’ve sold guns to C-Sec as well. That’s not a crime, is it?”

 

“No, of course not,” Chellick waited for a moment, “A large number of weapons were seized by Citadel security recently. They all came from you.”

 

“Let me guess, you want to know the buyer?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“It’s classified,” Hock huffed, staring at the wall. “My clients pay a lot of money to keep our business dealings discreet.”

 

“Mr. Hock, I’m sure we could come to some type of arrangement. Your client wouldn’t have to know that the information came from you. We can keep you safe.”

 

Hock chuckled, the sound wasn’t one of light-hearted amusement, it was something deeper. As if he wanted to say, “you have no idea what you’re dealing with.”

 

“Oh, you won’t need to keep me safe. But tell me, who will keep _you_ safe, hmm?”

 

There was a clamor outside the door and Kaidan had to eventually step away from the monitors to check. Someone in a suit had just bulldozed through Ridgefield and Kaidan could tell that the interrogation was over.

 

“Well, that was a bust,” Kaidan commented when Chellick came out of the interrogation room.

 

“At least now you know Hock’s client is someone important.”

 

“We still don’t know who it is and why they need all those guns.” Kaidan shook his head. “I have a bad feeling about this one.”

 

“What a time for Vakarian to take a break, huh?”

 

“I’ll say,” Kaidan said, under his breath.

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan half-expected John to be at the cafe when he arrived. A quick scan of the place proved him otherwise. He entertained the thought of leaving for a moment. After all, John was nowhere in sight. He could easily send him a message to say that Kaidan wasn’t about to wait for someone he didn’t want to see anyway.

 

Sadly, he knew firsthand how relentless John could be. Besides, if he could just make it through two hours without attempting to strangle John or drown him in the lake then maybe he could persuade John to turn informant instead. They certainly could use someone in John’s position right now. Low enough in the food chain not to have too much power but high enough that he had all the information.

 

He was deep in thoughts, most of the chatter around him melting into the background. The couple two tables over were busy planning a wedding—she wanted the ceremony to take place on the Citadel while he wanted it on Palaven. A krogan was trying to chat up the barista but the lines that he used were not only terrible, they were downright offensive. There was a man talking on the phone, complaining about sending enough pieces to complete a puzzle and yet that wasn’t enough to close a case.

 

Kaidan frowned for a moment, realizing that he recognized the voice. He heard the man say, “oh, shit. I should go,” before stopping right next to him.

 

“Can I,” he stopped even before he could finish his sentence, eyes wide open to take in John’s outfit of choice.

 

It wasn’t his usual clothes, the cargo pants and the ridiculous sleeveless jacket. He opted for dark jeans, a grey shirt and a very nice black, leather jacket. The boots weren’t his usual ones either. They were much nicer and they practically shined.

 

“Like what you see?” John asked with a leer.

 

And just like that, he was brought back to reality.

 

“You’re late,” he said, accusingly.

 

John frowned, taking a seat. He activated his omni-tool and looked at the display. “No, I’m not! I’m right on time! You’re _early_.”

 

He tried to keep the frown on his face as he shoved a menu at John. John gave him an exasperated look that he ignored before looking down at the menu and silently complaining about grouchy C-Sec officers.

 

While John was preoccupied, Kaidan snuck glances his way, taking in the way this John looked so different from the one that he was used to. Kaidan knew, to a certain degree, that John was rather good looking. The outfits he wore made it easy to forget, though.

 

Kaidan didn’t know whether he should be dismayed that John decided to pick a different outfit for their date or relieved. As it were, he was too busy chastising himself for liking the way John looked today.

 

The waitress arrived at their table and Kaidan quickly ordered his usual cup of coffee while he waited as John asked this question and that and deflected all of the waitress’ flirting attempts. Kaidan didn’t know if it was because they were on a date and John was being polite or because she wasn’t his type. He looked away for a second, reminding himself that it was none of his business because this was a one-time deal.

 

“Were you that eager to see me?”

 

“Excuse me?”

 

“I mean, you got here early and everything.” John shrugged, grinning lazily. “Anyone else would think that you couldn’t wait for this date to start.”

 

“That’s right. Because the sooner it starts, the sooner it ends,” Kaidan retorted, refusing to feel guilty about the way that stupid smile disappeared from John’s face.

 

“Come on, Detective. You can’t tell me that you weren’t curious about today. Just a little?”

 

Kaidan opened his mouth, ready to give him the usual verbal reaming when he felt something on his leg.

 

Was that?

 

Kaidan felt it again. It was definitely a foot, grazing his ankle at first and then, emboldened, it began to make its way up Kaidan’s leg. Kaidan didn’t look up, he made sure that John couldn’t read his expression before he kicked the foot away and then stomped on it, viciously.

 

John yelped loudly before cursing up a storm, face reddening when people in the coffee shop turned and stared. Kaidan gave him a triumphant smile before he got up, pointing at John.

 

“You’re testing my patience. I’m leaving.” As soon as those words left his mouth, John grabbed at his wrist. Kaidan had to blink down at the hand circling his wrist because it happened so quickly.

 

“Look, I’ll stop, OK?” John swallowed, looking away. “Besides, the agreement was for two hours, uninterrupted.”

 

Kaidan wanted to refuse, insist that this was a waste of time. But he wasn’t one to break a promise either. It was with great reluctance that he sat down again.

 

“Thank you,” John said, quietly. He grimaced, moving in his seat. “What kind of boots are you using anyway? Mag boots? I think you broke my foot.”

 

“You’re lucky if that’s the only thing broken.”

 

John raised his hands, chuckling tiredly. “I’ll let up, I promise.”

 

Kaidan shook his head and muttered, “Yeah. That’s what Vyrnnus used to say at BAaT.”

 

He didn’t mean to say it. At least, not aloud. The way that John froze at his words seemed to say that he caught those words.

 

“You were at Brain Camp?”

 

Kaidan jolted when he heard the familiar term. “I,” he shook his head. “How do you know that term?”

 

“I, ah, have a friend,” John said, slowly. He looked a little rueful. “Good guy. He went there as well. Told me all sorts of stories about the messed up stuff that went down there.”

 

“What’s his name?”

 

John looked wary and Kaidan watched as his entire body went rigid with tension. It was obvious that whoever his friend was, his identity was a closely guarded secret. Maybe John wasn’t even supposed to know him.

 

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked,” he said, gently. Gentler than he’d ever been with John before, which made the surprise on John’s face quite interesting to see.

 

Something happened then, something that Kaidan wasn’t sure about. It was in the way that John’s stance shifted somehow. He sat straighter and he looked calm but the tension from earlier was gone and the nervous energy that seemed to follow him disappeared as well.

 

It was like watching him transform into a new man.

 

“Thank you,” John said, in a different tone. It sounded slightly monotonous but Kaidan could tell that it was _genuine_ , not at all like his usual teasing voice.

 

“You’re welcome,” he replied, slowly. He was surprised and maybe a little delighted to see John duck down slightly to hide a soft, barely-there smile.

 

There was a sudden silence between them. Not quite awkward but not really comfortable either, as if they were trying to think of something to say.

 

“I’m sorry,” John said, after Kaidan was half-tempted to start asking about the weather.

 

“For what?” He asked, before chuckling and saying, “You haven’t done anything today. Then again, it’s still early.”

 

This time, when John cringed, he actually felt guilty.

 

“About all of that, actually. I mean,” John made a frustrated sound, scratching his neck. “I’m really bad at this.”

 

“Yeah, I can tell.” He quickly added, “I’m out of practice myself, so I really can’t comment. But...you’re doing pretty well today.”

 

John looked up, a small, amused smile beginning to grow on his face. “Yeah?”

 

Kaidan hummed, nodding. “But like I said, it’s still early,” he teased.

 

They laughed together, happy and comfortable. For the first time in weeks, Kaidan actually felt relaxed and he leaned back against his chair to stare at John.

 

“What did you do to all of the flowers that I sent?”

 

“Aside from sending them to the hospital?”

 

John nodded. “I heard you’re pretty popular with the nurses now thanks to that.”

 

“My partner and I get into trouble now and then. It’s good to keep the people who try to patch us up happy.”

 

“So what _is_ your favorite flower?” John asked, tone curious. Though it might sound innocent enough, Kaidan knew better than to just trust it, even after the comfortable zone that they'd established, so he levelled an extremely flat look at John.

 

“Why.” It wasn’t a question, not really.

 

John laughed and raised his hands in a placating gesture. “I’m honestly curious. I mean, you weren’t impressed when I sent you those lilies, even though they’re super rare.”

 

He entertained the thought of ignoring the question for a moment, but a memory seized him. He was sitting next to his grandmother while his parents argued. The word “biotic” was used several times. He knew then that they were arguing about him, about the strange things that he could do that most humans couldn’t.

 

It was when the word “freak” was mentioned--his parents didn’t think that, never thought that, but they were worried that others might--that his grandmother made an impatient sound, got to her feet and closed the door. It blocked out the argument, but the damage was done.

 

“Don’t you worry about that, Kaidan. No matter what nasty things people will say, we know the truth. We know what a good boy you are,” she told him, running her fingers through his hair. He felt like she was babying him, but he knew better. She always knew how far she could push him before it was too much, the only one who did, really.

 

“Don’t you listen to them. You listen to grandma, hmm?” She hummed softly as she held him close. He remembered that moment well, the way her fingers ran through his hair as, the smell of gardenias that clung to her, the way she kept on humming a nameless song as his world changed rapidly around him.

 

A hesitant touch on his wrist and a slowly muttered, “Kaidan,” drew him out of his memories.

 

“What?”

 

“Ah. Sorry. What did you say?” He shook his head, trying to clear it. When he looked back at John, he was surprised to see that the usual teasing smirk was gone. In fact, his entire posture was different. He didn’t slouch on his seat, his back was ramrod straight. He wasn’t smiling, either.

 

It was his eyes that were different, that made Kaidan stop and stare.

 

They were their usual blue but there was concern there and something else. Something that was genuine, for once. It wasn’t the easy smiles or the leering looks, it was something that Kaidan hadn’t seen yet.

 

To this day, Kaidan would swear that it was that look that made Kaidan answer when John asked quietly if he was all right.

 

“Gardenia.”

 

“Uh. What?” Clearly, John was taken aback by the non sequitur.

 

“My favorite flower. Gardenias, they’re my favorite.”

 

“Any particular reason?” John smiled, but it wasn’t a smirk or anything like his normal smile or even the one that he saw earlier. If anything, it looked almost gentle. It suited him more than any of his usual expressions.

 

“My grandmother, it was her favorite flower.”

 

And that was how he launched into a story about his grandmother, her character, her habits and the stories she used to tell him. Stopping now and then to answer John’s questions about Vancouver, his childhood or his parents. He even talked about the memory that had him so disoriented earlier, about how that was the last time he spoke to her because he was shipped off to BAaT the next day.

 

“She died two weeks later.”

 

“I’d say I’m sorry, but I’m told that doesn’t help,” John said, carefully. “I’d say I know how you feel but I don’t, not really. I don’t have family so I’ve never...”

 

Kaidan swallowed, looking at John looking at him. “I think that’s the first true thing I’ve ever heard you say.”

 

And there was that smile again, just a faint curl of John’s lips. Just like before, he ducked down to hide it.

 

“Well, I figured I owe it to you.”

 

“You mean after the public humiliation that I’ve been subjected to thanks to you?”

 

John chuckled, hiding his smile behind his hand. “So let me make it up to you.”

 

It would be so easy to just tease him back, to keep this friendly atmosphere. So of course he’d say the wrong things.

 

“How did you end up like this?”

 

John froze for a moment and then reverted back to his usual self. Kaidan could feel his stomach sinking as he watched. “What? As the suave guy who’s trying to catch your attention?”

 

“No. I mean...why are you criminal?” It was one of those moments where he desperately wanted to hit the abort button but found himself unable to.

 

This time even the fake smile disappeared and John straightened. Kaidan hated the way his face became blank, as if wiped clean.

 

“I think we’re done here,” John said, getting to his feet. Kaidan should just let him go, keep things nice and uncomplicated. But something was making him move, made him catch John’s wrist on reflex.

 

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean...You still have over an hour,” he said, desperately.

 

“I’m the one calling it off, Detective, so you don’t have to worry about it. You won’t see me again.” John nodded, pulling his wrist gently out of Kaidan’s wrist. He smiled his usual teasing smirk but even that looked fragile on his face. When he finally left, Kaidan didn’t try to follow.

 

He sat back down, staring blankly at the table for a moment. He shook himself out of his stupor moments later and got up, taking out his credit chit to pay for the coffee. Something made him glance down, he didn’t know what, and that was when he saw the disk on the chair that John had vacated in a hurry.

 

He looked around, quickly, wondering if John would come back for it. After a couple of seconds, he took the disk and pocketed it. If anything, it might serve as an excuse for them to meet again and for Kaidan to apologize.

 

 

*

 

 

He spent most of Saturday evening brooding in his home office before his conscience got the better of him. Checking his omni-tool, he searched for John’s details. John had added it at the start of his courting attempt, though after his first bouquet. Kaidan had the urge to erase it when he first had it but he kept forgetting.

 

_John,_

_I’m sorry that our day ended on a bad note. We were both having a good time before I asked you something that I shouldn’t have. It’s clearly none of my business._

_I only wanted to know because you’re a good man, John. Under all that bluster, I can see that you’re a good person. I won’t bring this matter up again._

_I hope that you’ll forgive me and that you’ll give me a chance to make it up to you. A second date, maybe?_

_\--Kaidan_

 

He stared at the message for a moment and sent it. He could only hope that it was enough.

 

 

*

 

 

He didn’t hear from John for three days. Attempting to ignore the bitter disappointment and the regret, he tried to remind himself that he no longer had to deal with humiliating presents. But even that thought failed to cheer him up.

 

It was on Wednesday that he finally received a reply, even after he spent the day ignoring all the jokes that people were making.

 

Did you finally kill him, Alenko? Did you pack him in a crate bound for the Terminus systems? Was the date that much of disaster?

 

Normally, he’d ignore them until they went away. It was the mention of the date that did it, though. He glared at Lang until the kid gulped and made himself scarce. Of course, that only added to his admittedly foul mood because he felt additional guilt for taking it out on poor Eddie.

 

When he entered his apartment, he was ready to fall asleep. Knowing his body, he knew that wasn’t an option. Being a biotic meant needing a lot of food and skipping dinner would mean that he’d be in a worse mood tomorrow morning.

 

He was still debating on what to eat when he entered his dining area and he noticed something strange.

 

There was a vase of gardenias on his dining room table.

 

He stopped for a moment, hand hovering over the side table, key card dangling between his fingers. The room smelled of coffee all of a sudden and he thought back to the small coffee shop with the uncomfortable chairs. He thought of the way that John leaned forward while he spoke about Vancouver, eyes shining, smile fond.

 

John looked different then, in between the bad jokes and corny pickup lines he asked legitimate questions. He listened while Kaidan spoke about his mom and dad, and even the orchard back in BC.

 

It was that moment that Kaidan remembered most, the way John ducked his head down in a shy gesture, so different from his usual cocky attitude. He thought, then and now, that there was another layer to John, one that he hadn't seen before. One that was hidden underneath all the bluster, all this bravado.

 

He walked towards the bouquet, not even registering that the card had slipped through his fingers.

 

The petals were soft, exactly the same as in his memories, but it was the smell that forced a laugh out of him. It was familiar and long-missed. Each flower was a perfect white, unblemished. He spent some time staring at them, thoughts swirling in his mind and for a moment, he felt the need to call John and thank him for this gift.

 

And then he saw the note.

_Kaidan,_

_You’re forgiven._

_John S._

_PS: Does this mean we’re going steady?_

 

Kaidan groaned.

 

He couldn’t help but smile afterward, even though it probably meant more torment from John. He hoped that the gardenias would signal a change in John’s tactics. That the humiliating gifts would stop and then perhaps they could make something out of this.

 

 

*

 

 

“Detective Alenko, I presume?”

 

“Yes, sir,” Kaidan nodded, feeling a little awkward. He wanted to salute the Admiral or do something, his hand twitching while he debated what he should do.

 

“I heard that you’re working on a case for C-Sec, about some weapons that you’ve acquired?”

 

Kaidan straightened, the investigator in him pushing aside the military cadet that he should have been.

 

“You have information for us, Admiral?”

 

Kahoku smiled, though it didn’t particularly look happy. If anything, it made him look older.

 

“I have information for you, Alenko, and only you,” he hesitated. “Is this a secure channel?”

 

“Yes, sir. We have our own encryption here at Investigations. It varies from office to office so only the detective in charge is allowed access.”

 

The Admiral sigh carried over the communication systems. “Some of my men were on routine patrol last month and they stumbled across an unmarked frigate. The frigate opened fire before my men were able to make contact.”

 

“What happened to them?”

 

“They were all killed but not before they relayed the information to another Alliance ship. That ship captured the frigate but when they boarded, there was barely any cargo and most of the crew inside were dead. Poisoned, or so the investigators told me.”

 

“Admiral, I don’t see how this is related to my investigation.”

 

“These men were professionals, Detective Alenko. And they all wore the same white and yellow uniform. “

 

“So, not a known merc group,” Kaidan said, slowly.

 

“No. But what will interest you is the type of weapons that they were using,” Kahoku said, steel and fire in his eyes. Gone was the weary old man that Kaidan saw at the beginning of their conversation. “They have different code names. Gorgon assault rifles, Hydra shotgun, Titan sniper rifles, and the Harpy pistol. And there’s another one, a particularly nasty one. The official title is Lieberschaft 2180 but top-tiered mercenary units call it,”

 

“The Eviscerator,” Kaidan finished, lips thinning.

 

“Yes. I take it you’re familiar with that weapon?”

 

Kaidan nodded, trying to control his emotions. “All those weapons that you’ve mentioned, they were the ones seized by C-Sec in a raid less than a month ago.”

 

“You better keep those weapons tightly contained, Detective. You boys at C-Sec could probably use some powerful arms but they’re in violation of several treaties, or so I’m told. Best to get rid of them as quickly as you can.”

 

“It’s too late for that, Admiral.”

 

“Why?”

 

Kaidan paused, realizing that he was about to release an info that only a select few at C-SEC were privy to. Still, Kahoku checked out. He had 3 different people to do the check on him. Besides, his instincts told him that he should trust the Admiral and he always trusted his instincts.

 

“They were stolen from one of our warehouses days after they were confiscated.”

 

“Damn!” Kahoku slammed his hand on the table, startling Kaidan. “Whatever it is that these bastards are planning, it won’t be good. And the Alliance can’t do anything about it with the records sealed.”

 

“Admiral, there might be something I can do. Whatever it is that these guys are planning, they’re obviously going to do it either on the Citadel or from here.”

 

“Detective, I can’t give you all the information but I can point you in the right direction. Search for Cerberus.”

 

“Cerberus? Sir, I take it you mean something other than the myth.”

 

“I can’t give you more than that. Good luck. For all our sakes.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan could feel the beginning of a migraine when he finished speaking to Kahoku. What started out as a strange smuggling case was beginning to sound like something else entirely. Every time he stumbled across a clue of some sort, he uncovered more and more sinister happenings.

 

He was really missing Garrus, because there was no one around to talk to about this. He also didn’t know whether he should trust anyone with this information. The fact that the weapons were missing meant whoever stole them must have some connection to C-Sec.

 

The best explanation would be that it was an inside job.

 

Kaidan shook his head, trying not to dwell on that thought. Not just yet. Instead, he began searching for Cerberus.

 

It didn’t take long for him to hit a roadblock.

 

The Cerberus file was Alliance property and it was sealed tight. Probably a good thing that he had a secret weapon. He scrolled down his contact list, found the name he wanted and pressed call.

 

There was a child crying in the background when Karin Chakwas answered her call with a quick, “Yes, Detective Alenko?”

 

“Doctor Chakwas? I have a favor to ask.”

 

 

*

 

 

It took some cajoling, but Dr. Chakwas finally agreed. Her no nonsense attitude had always appealed to Kaidan, although that might be his BAaT training talking. Still, he was relieved when he wheedled the promise out of her. It also meant that he would have to take her out to lunch one of these days. Or buy her another bottle of Serrice Ice Brandy again.

 

Still having this lead was a good thing and he was in a good enough mood that he didn’t feel the need for more overtime, already thinking about what he planned on doing that night. He was standing in front of his desk, moving some files around and contemplating staying in and watching a vid when his door opened and Shepard walked in.

 

“You really need to work on your social skills,” Kaidan said, lightly. He was still a little irritated by Shepard’s note but the flowers made up for it. He did scowl when Shepard sauntered over and parked his ass on his desk, though.

 

“You got the flowers, right?”

 

“And your note. Again.”

 

“Can’t have flowers without a note, Kaidan.”

 

“Where do you even come up with those lines anyway?”

 

“It’s a gift.”

 

Kaidan snorted. “I’ll bet.”

 

“You think that gift will include charming the pants off a certain C-Sec investigator?”

 

“I wouldn’t bet on _that_ , no.”

 

John laughed, a little different than his usual chuckles. If Kaidan were honest, he might admit that he liked hearing it. Fortunately, he was pretty damn good at ignoring complicated things.

 

John shook his head, he had the same tiny, almost bashful grin that Kaidan saw at the cafe. It twisted into the normal lazy smirk that wasn’t quite as charming and John opened his mouth to reply but something made him stop. The smirk was frozen on his face for a moment, before it disappeared completely when he tilted his head and said, “Garrus?”

 

What?

 

Kaidan turned around and saw that it was indeed his partner. Back well before his holiday was over, too. Then again, Garrus was never one to stay away from work for too long. That he took a month off was a miracle in and of itself.

 

“John? What are you doing here? I thought you were killed by mercs in Omega.”

 

“I get that sometimes,” John replied happily, immediately adding, “Honestly, Garrus, I’m hurt! Why would I die in Omega? And killed by mercs? I’d rather be killed in a fight to the death against a thresher maw.”

 

"There were reports, John. They were talking about identifying your remains," Garrus said dryly. Anyone else would have thought that his partner was relaxed, but even though Kaidan was still absolutely confused by the conversation happening in front of him, he could hear the barely contained anger under that dry tone.

 

Apparently, so did John.

 

"I had to lay low for a while. Pissed off one too many gangs, that’s all,” John said, carefully. “What about this? I’ll tell you the story over some whisky? Turian for you and good old Peruvian whisky for me! It'll be just like the old days."

 

“Except in the old days you've never come back to life after being dead for two years,” Garrus pointed out, but he was calm again.

 

"And yet you don't seem as surprised as you should be, Garrus," John said, with a thoughtful look.

 

"I'm a very good investigator, Shepard.” Garrus turned to look at Kaidan, who was staring at the two of them with a perplexed look on his face. Honestly, Kaidan wasn’t sure whether to demand what was going on--and why Garrus was back and apparently friendly with John--or to call up someone to throw them both out. “You OK, Alenko?”

 

“You’ve got ten seconds to tell me what the hell is going on, Vakarian.”

 

“John and I had a mutually beneficial partnership,” Garrus said, though when he saw the way Kaidan and John were looking at him, hastily added, “Of the platonic kind! He helped me out with a difficult case about three years ago.”

 

“Garrus, you make it sound so simple,” John said in his usual deadpan. “I pined for you, you know. Hell, I’d drop Kaidan here in a heartbeat if it means you’ll take me back.”

 

“Can’t drop me if you never had me,” Kaidan pointed out, a little bothered by how _unbothered_ he was with John’s insinuations. Then again, after the, um, sex toy incident, anything John said would be considered rather tame.

 

“Are you offering?”

 

“Oh, I see now.” Garrus had the audacity to laugh. “Have you been getting yourself a social life while I’ve been gone, Alenko?”

 

“If only to get through the cold and lonely nights,” Kaidan retorted. “You’re not going to leave me with that half-assed answer, Vakarian. What’s the real story here?”

 

For a moment, Garrus looked uncomfortable. John, on the other hand, looked amused, though Kaidan was able to detect a flicker of something behind that. He wasn’t a C-Sec investigator for nothing. Still, it looked like whatever Garrus had to say was probably not quite legal and shouldn’t be discussed in a C-Sec office.

 

“OK, fine. You’re buying, Garrus,” Kaidan said, pointing at his partner, already walking out the door. There was a prickle of something at the back of his mind, it was as if someone had poked at his brain. He turned around to stare at John who looked unsure for once. “You can come along, John.”

 

The grin he received was positively blinding.

 

 

*

 

 

It was Garrus who suggested Flux, tossing a knowing glance at Kaidan. He ignored it, even though he could feel his face heat in embarrassment.

 

“Why not Chora’s Den?” John asked. “Or is that too seedy for Kaidan’s tastes?”

 

“Oh, it’s definitely not too seedy for Alenko’s tastes,” Garrus had the turian equivalent of a shit-eating grin on his face. Don’t ask how Kaidan knew, he just did. “If anything, he’d be too distracted by the asari dancers to pay attention.”

 

“Really? Asari, Kaidan?” John shook his head, assuming a hurt expression. “Never thought you’d be into them.”

 

“What’s not to like? They’re very attractive.”

 

“True,” John conceded. “I was just hoping that your type might lean towards handsome and charming men instead of curvaceous asari.”

 

“Handsome and charming, huh? Well, when I bump into one of them, I’ll let you know.”

 

“Ouch, Alenko. You’ll hurt the poor guy’s feelings! I mean, I know John here has a healthy ego,” Garrus paused as Kaidan snorted with laughter, “but he has feelings, you know!”

 

“Garrus, you haven’t been here to see my dedicated courtship,” John said, sighing dramatically.

 

“Why don’t you tell your old friend Garrus all about that,” Garrus nodded his head in sympathy as all three of them entered Flux.

 

“I have a feeling this is going to be a big mistake,” Kaidan muttered to himself.

 

 

*

 

 

After they had their pick of which poison to drink, Garrus had told the tale of his meeting with John in Omega while trying to track down Dr. Saleon.

 

Kaidan knew all about the sabbatical that Garrus took. Gossip traveled fast in C-Sec, like everywhere else, really. People were laying bets on how long it would take until Garrus submitted his resignation, famous as he was for disliking the red tapes that came with being in C-Sec.

 

He returned just under two months later, refreshed and ready to go. By that time, Kaidan had been transferred into Investigations and their Captain wanted him partnered up with someone. It was a no-brainer that it was with Garrus.

 

Most people stepped back and waited for the inevitable explosion. It never came. Still hadn’t, even now. They had different methods, sure, but they both dislike injustice. In the end, that was all that mattered.

 

Which was why, despite the fact that he wasn’t exactly comfortable with how Garrus went about solving that case, he didn’t comment. In fact, he was more curious about how John had sought out Garrus, after hearing some rumors from a couple of Aria T’Loak’s lackeys. That John had helped without even asking Garrus himself for credits, just permission to sell whatever goods they’d find at Saleon’s hideout...well, it was a surprise.

 

No ordinary criminal would do that, especially the part where he actually asked permission. Kaidan knew John wasn’t an ordinary guy, but this? This changed things. Especially how Garrus hinted that John had been one of his many sources before he apparently pissed off too many merc groups and had to disappear.

 

The story turned into something else, a story about a merc that Garrus apparently knew. Kaidan wasn’t really listening, though Garrus seemed to find it amusing.

 

Garrus laughed and signaled the bartender for another round. “Put it on my tab,” he said to the salarian.

 

“You’re paying? Really?” John asked in his monotone. Garrus and Kaidan snorted at the exact same time, a testament to how in sync they were.

 

"Ever heard of inflection, John?" Garrus asked, in a deceptively light tone.

 

"Ever heard of cosmetic surgery, Garrus?" John retorted, glaring over his drink.

 

"And have _all_ the ladies come to me? Are you sure you want to do that?"

 

"What do I need ladies for? I have Kaidan!"

 

"You really, really don't,” Kaidan muttered, though he was trying not to smile. Beside him, Garrus chuckled and found himself on the receiving end of a smack from John. Apparently, he was reluctant to hit Kaidan but Garrus was fair game. He did, however, give Kaidan a sad look that would probably have made a lesser man feel bad.

 

But Kaidan was better than that. Besides, that little twinge he felt was just the alcohol.

 

 

*

 

 

Later, with enough alcohol in his system to make him a perfect balance of happy and relaxed, Kaidan sat back and let the other two talk. John was busy boasting to Garrus about one of his past exploits, so Kaidan took the time to observe him.

 

He looked different.

 

He wore the outfit Kaidan preferred, the black leather jacket, shirt that clung like sin itself and jeans that flattered his ass in ways that Kaidan still refused to acknowledge. Any other time, with no alcohol involved, he would have ignored it. Now, he actually had to swallow and look away for a moment. 

 

Still, his curiosity got the better of him and he turned to look again.

 

It was in the way John moved, Kaidan thought to himself. There were fewer hand gestures. He was...disciplined in how he held himself, as if sitting still was something that he was expected to do.

 

At the same time, he looked relaxed. Not to the extent that he had been at that coffee shop, the way he would lean forward with ease and his whole body turned towards Kaidan. Still, it was different and good to see.

 

He didn’t like the fact that there were different layers to John, but he did like the fact that whatever front he was putting up, it seemed to drop around Kaidan and now Garrus, too.

 

A loud bark of laughter from John shook him out of his thoughts.

 

“And that’s how I cheated the Blue Suns on Omega,” John finished, still chuckling. He glanced at Garrus, who was staring at him with a calculating look. “You don’t believe me?”

 

“Well, you are known for your tall-tales, John. In fact, the appropriate reaction to this would be, are you engaging in reproductive behavior with this one?”

 

Kaidan cursed under his breath. Of course Garrus would have to bring Blasto lines into this. How could he not? After all the precautions that he took in making sure no one at the HQ even mentioned Blasto whenever John was around...all undone because of his partner.

 

Still, he was a little surprised that John hadn’t started howling in laughter. Or, what he feared most, turned to Kaidan and started on all the Elcor jokes. Instead, John was quiet and there was this... _look_ on his face.

 

The look that John gave Garrus was reverent and he shifted closer, looking Garrus straight in the eyes, completely serious and said, “Garrus, marry me?”

 

Kaidan groaned and looked away, but Garrus laughed, quite willing to play this game. “Shepard, didn’t you propose to Alenko earlier this evening?”

 

John’s gaze shifted to Kaidan, who looked back at him, warily. “Then we can have a three-way relationship. I’ve heard that they’re good for you,” he replied, face still solemn. Kaidan narrowed his eyes at him, opting to down the rest of his glass.

 

“Well,” Garrus said, looking like he was considering it, much to Kaidan’s horror. “We can always take turns.”

 

“I hate you both, I swear,” Kaidan muttered into his empty glass, as his partner and John laughed themselves silly. He watched them both, taking in their hunched forms as their bodies shook with laughter, he couldn’t find it in himself to be annoyed for long. Not that he would tell them that, of course. Still, he couldn’t help but feel that the night was a success.

 

 

*

 

 

“Well, that was fun. We should do that again sometime.” John rolled his shoulders as he spoke, a grin on his face.

 

“I think I’ll pass,” Kaidan replied, though he mostly did it to get a rise out of John. It really wasn’t fair that he drank more than anyone and yet he wasn’t passed out drunk.

 

“Come on, Alenko. You can’t tell me you didn’t have a little fun,” Garrus said. He and John gazed at Kaidan with identical expectant looks on their faces. It was a little disturbing.

 

He sighed, lips twitching slightly. Ah. What the hell?

 

“With great amusement, fun, what’s that?”

 

Garrus was used to these lines from Kaidan and so only laughed quietly. John, on the other hand, looked like someone just told him they were having a sale on exotic fishes at the pet store. Really, how ridiculous could the man get?

 

John shook his head, looking away for a moment. He opened his mouth, ready to say something but then his eyes caught on something and the grin vanished. Kaidan and Garrus followed his gaze and saw a turian with Spectre armor and insignia across the lake, standing by the transport terminal.

 

"I should go," John muttered, eyes trained on the Spectre like a hawk.

 

"John," Garrus said, tone sharp. He waited until John looked at him before continuing. "What kind of trouble are you chasing this time?"

 

The grin that Shepard gave was wild and fierce.

 

"Nothing you have to worry about, Vakarian."

 

"Garrus and I are C-Sec, if you get caught up in something way over your head, it'll end up being our business," Kaidan pointed out.

 

"I always knew you cared, Alenko," Shepard--the damn bastard--even had the gall to wink.

 

"I mean it, Shepard," Kaidan snapped. The teasing look was gone, replaced by something fond and tender, making Kaidan want to punch him in the face for looking like that.

 

"I'll be OK, Kaidan."

 

Kaidan wanted to say, "that's not what I meant" or even "if you get killed, that's more paperwork for me" or something similar. But he found that he couldn't. Shepard drove him up the wall with his flirting and cheesy pickup lines and all that groping, but as much as Kaidan hated to admit it, Shepard was actually growing on him. Like fungus.

 

And the thought that whatever it was that Shepard was caught up in could end in him being tossed out of the airlock or treating his mangled remains hidden in an air duct made Kaidan sick to his stomach.

 

He and Garrus watched Shepard’s form fade in with the crowd.

 

“That’s going to spell trouble,” Garrus muttered, making a soft noise, a mixture of annoyance and curiosity.

 

“Do we really want to know what a mercenary like Shepard is doing tailing a Spectre?”

 

“Not really,” Garrus replied, beginning to walk away. “But I think we better find out, don’t you?”

 

Kaidan snorted, his grin matching the one on Garrus’ face. “Off the record?”

 

“Off the record,” Garrus confirmed, before adding, “until the higher-ups find out.”

 

“Guess we better make sure they don’t find out, then.”

 

“This one believes this will be the conception of an aesthetically-pleasing affable association.”

 

Kaidan groaned, because honestly, when did Garrus get his hand on Casablanca? Then again, with this smuggling case that was turning into a dead end than anything, Kaidan could use a little fun. Despite what people might think, he _did_ know how to have fun.

 

Looking back at his partner, he finally relented, “Badassfully, let’s stir up some trouble.”

 

“Now that’s more like it.”

 

“That’s two in one night, Vakarian.”

 

“You must really like John.”

 

Whatever Garrus said, Kaidan will forever maintain that shoving him in the lake was an accident. Besides, he went in after him. After watching Garrus flail and try to drown.

 

 

*

 

 

There was no news from John for about a week. Kaidan tried not to think about it. He kept himself busy by updating Garrus on the smuggling case which was slowly turning into something else altogether.

 

There was an almost manic energy in the way he tried chasing different leads, all the while preventing himself from checking up on Dr. Chakwas because he knew better than to annoy the one real lead he had.

 

Garrus didn’t say much, but there were a lot of pointed looks thrown his way.

 

It was the eighth day that that Garrus finally broke the strange and unspoken agreement they had by asking about John.

 

“Have you heard from John?”

 

It was an innocent question and one that probably other people at C-Sec wanted to ask. After John’s antics, they pretty much got used to seeing him around, bothering Kaidan. Kaidan knew they wanted to ask him and a couple had tried to, but Kaidan was a master at deflecting difficult questions. It made family dinners bearable when he was sent back from Brain Camp, before he joined the C-Sec Academy.

 

Kaidan ignored the question, the same way he ignored his stomach churning when he thought of how this was the longest that he hadn’t heard from John. He hated how worried he was about this man who just walked into his life and messed it all up after he spent years making sure everything was nice and perfect and tidy.

 

All his issues belonged in one box and it was sealed up tight. John’s presence caused the box to wrench open, the contents spilling on the floor. He was both baffled and annoyed that a man he’d only known for barely over a month was able to change him so much.

 

“Kaidan?”

 

“No,” he snapped, immediately regretting it when Garrus looked up from his work to stare at him. “Sorry. No, I haven’t heard from him.”

 

“I found out about that Spectre that we saw.”

 

“You did?”

 

“Nihlus Kryik. One of the best, apparently.”

 

“Your usual informant?”

 

“A friend of a friend,” Garrus said, with amusement. Kaidan shook his head, knowing better than to ask.

 

“You’ve known John longer, Garrus. What’s he doing following a Spectre?”

 

Garrus paused for a moment, staring at the doorway. He slowly got up and closed the door, turning the privacy lock on.

 

“From what I heard, this Nihlus is a good guy. I know turian Spectres don’t always get along with humans but my guy told me that Nihlus is helping the Council with a recent development.”

 

“You mean the Alliance petitioning for a human representative on the Council?”

 

“Yes, and you know these politicians, they’re always making a mess of things.”

 

“Still, a human Councillor is a big deal. And a good thing for the Alliance.”

 

“I won’t argue with you on that. I do know, however, that a lot of mercenary groups have been twitchy lately. Aside from the ones being hired as bodyguards, it looks like some of the criminals here are a little...nervous about what a human Spectre might do to their business.”

 

“Why would they need to be nervous? Spectres don’t bother with petty crimes and they certainly don’t care very much about maintaining a low death rate.”

 

“Unless?”

 

“Unless someone, somewhere is planning something big,” Kaidan said, slowly. He thought back to the shipments and what Admiral Kahoku told him about Cerberus. “Something that has to do with the shipment of guns from Donovan Hock that mysteriously vanished from a C-Sec warehouse.”

 

“Exactly.”

 

“And John’s in the middle of this.” It wasn’t a question, not really, but Garrus nodded anyway. They both stayed silent, lost in thoughts. Kaidan was almost relieved for the knock on their door.

 

“Detective Vakarian, ready to go?” Haron asked when Garrus opened the door.

 

“I’ll meet you downstairs.” Garrus turned to look at Kaidan just as Haron started to go. “Let’s look over everything tomorrow.”

 

Kaidan nodded, even as he thought about the small disk that he had yet to return to John. The one that he forgot about until now. It was time to take a look at it, he thought. He just hoped that whatever information he found inside wasn’t going to be bad.

 

Whatever it was that John was doing, Kaidan hoped that it didn’t involve guns and a human Spectre candidate that no one knew about.

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan wasn’t sure if the disk had any sort of security lock on it. Still, it shouldn’t be that much of a problem. He really ought to have asked Tali for help but she was probably home or with Garrus. Fortunately, there was a very basic lock that was easily bypassed and he ran a quick scan on the disk before he opened it.

 

There was only one file and when Kaidan opened it, he was surprised to see that it was a list.

 

It was a list of names, to be exact. Names, occupation and address, of about two hundred people. 30 or so were based on the Citadel and he noted that some of them were C-Sec. Harkin’s name jumped out, as did another human officer. Other than that, there was no other information. Kaidan didn’t know why these people were on the list.

 

He sighed, knowing that the only way for him to get some sort of answer was to search for them all. Staring at the list, he started off with a doctor based in Illium, waiting as the C-Sec database began to search for any information.

 

Two hours later, Kaidan wasn’t even halfway through the list and he already had too much information to work with. What was once a low-grade headache had turned into a full-scale migraine and Kaidan collapsed on the couch as he tried to sleep off the pain.

 

The banging on the door yanked him out of sleep. He was disoriented at first. Remnants of his migraine made his head feel sluggish but he managed to grab his pistol before he went to the door.

 

Slowly he began to realize that he hadn't buzzed anyone in. Whoever was behind those doors had manage to get past security. He readied both his pistol and his biotics. Better safe than sorry.

 

He activated the screen and felt his heart skip when he saw Shepard grinning at him.

 

"Hey, Kaidan. Gonna let me in?"

 

For a second he thought Shepard was drunk, by the way he slurred the words. This was before he took in the sickly pallor of Shepard's skin and the way he seemed to be leaning his entire weight against the wall.

 

Kaidan slammed his hand against the door controls before he could think twice. When the door opened to reveal the true article, Kaidan stared in horror at the crimson stain on Shepard's shirt, covering his sleeve and part of his torso.

 

"Are you bleeding?" he asked, like an idiot. Shepard laughed, or at least, he tried to. It soon turned into a pained grimace and his knees buckled. Kaidan was barely able to catch him in time before his hard head met the floor.

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan watched silently as Karin Chakwas worked her magic.

 

He was pretty sure his heart had stopped when John crumpled to the floor. He barely had enough sense to slap some emergency medi-gel on him before he called Dr. Chakwas. She had a few choice words for him for the lateness of his call but he must have looked a state because she immediately rushed to his apartment.

 

“He’s stable. And very lucky,” Dr. Chakwas said, moving away from where John was unconscious on Kaidan’s bed. He was trying to ignore the way John’s form looked against his sheets, despite the fact that he was pale and unwell.

 

“What can you tell me, Doc?”

 

“I scanned his wounds before I treated them. I figured you might want to see. It might help you catch whoever did this to him.”

 

Kaidan nodded, tapping at his omni-tool. He tried not to make a face at the pictures because crime scene photographs were one thing when the vic was a stranger. This was different, personal.

 

As Dr. Chakwas began packing away her things, he ran the scan against the C-Sec database. Hopefully he’d have the type of gun used by the shooter in a minute or two. When he looked back up, he saw that Dr. Chakwas was staring at him with an expression he couldn’t quite read.

 

“Doc? Is everything okay?”

 

“You remember the matter that you asked me to look into, Detective Alenko?”

 

“Yeah. You have something for me?”

 

“Before I tell you anything, I have a question for you.”

 

“Uh. OK?”

 

“Who is he to you?” Dr. Chakwas said, pointing at John.

 

“Wait, what does that have to do with the information?”

 

“Humor me, Alenko.”

 

“Doc, that’s...personal,” Kaidan struggled for a moment to try and change the topic. Whatever it was that Dr. Chakwas was looking for, she clearly didn’t need it in words. One look at Kaidan’s expression and her face cleared.

 

“I’ll send you the information later. But, Alenko?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Whatever those files say, I want you to promise me that you’ll get all the evidence before you start making accusations, OK?”

 

“Karin, what’s going on?”

 

“I can’t tell you more. Just read the file and gather the evidence. You can be angry after you’ve solved this case, is that clear?”

 

“Yes, ma’am.”

 

“Good,” Karin said, nodding her head, evidently satisfied. “He’ll be alright. Make sure he’s rested before he goes gallivanting around the Citadel.”

 

“Yeah, I will. And, Doctor Chakwas?”

 

“Yes?”

 

“Thank you.”

 

“You’re very welcome, Detective Alenko.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan wasn’t sure what woke him up at first. He’d been dreaming of being inside a ship, staring at the stars and of a familiar hand at the back of his neck. He remembered feeling warm and content, moving back into the touch.

 

It was a nice feeling and he wanted to stay there for a while longer but something was pulling back into the waking world.

 

When he blinked his eyes open and saw John looking down at him with a fondly amused look, he immediately lurched up into a sitting position.

 

“What are you doing? You should be resting!”

 

“I think I’ve rested enough,” John said, even though he was clutching the couch. “Besides, I think you’d want your bed back.”

 

“I don’t need my bed back. I just want you well,” Kaidan insisted. He was staring at John’s face, so he got to witness the way all these different emotions flash through it. Confusion, frustration, surprise, and another one, the one that Kaidan witnessed before. He wasn’t sure if it was his lack of sleep that did it or if it was delayed terror and panic from what happened last night but he reached out to grab John’s shirt and haul him in for a kiss.

 

It was horribly short, just a firm press of their lips. John moved back a little, planting his knee on the couch next to Kaidan’s. They stayed that way, unmoving, for a moment.

 

John’s mouth was parted slightly and Kaidan could feel his breath against his own lips. The second time they kissed, it was John who leaned in first, who slotted their lips together. But it was Kaidan who led, who set the desperate pace, grazing his teeth against John’s lower lip.

 

When they both pulled back, it was only far enough to catch their breath and Kaidan leaned forward to rest his forehead against John’s, closing his eyes for a moment. He could feel John’s hand cupping the back of his neck, his fingers tangling in his hair.

 

This was such a bad idea but Kaidan didn’t know how to stop.

 

It didn’t take long before John shifted and Kaidan was reminded that John had yet to fully heal. He moved back a little to give John more room to sit down. Apparently, the lack of contact for even a minute or so was too much for John, because after he sat, he took one of Kaidan’s hand in his.

 

“So? What now?”

 

“You can tell me how you got shot, maybe?”

 

John groaned, wiping at his face with his free hand. “You really know how to ruin a moment.”

 

“Me?” Kaidan said, with an incredulous laugh. Because, really, was John serious?

 

John just raised his eyebrows in reply. To this day, Kaidan would swear that he was preoccupied because he was trying to think of something to say to John and that was why he didn’t even notice the door opening and closing.

 

“Is this a human courting ritual that I’m not aware of?”

 

He pulled away from John to gaze at the door. Garrus was leaning against the doorway with a smug look on his face--they’d been partners for a while, Kaidan was well-versed with the different levels of smug that Garrus exudes. This one was at least a level 2, a level of smugness reserved for pulling a fast one on Pallin.

 

He had a witty one-liner that would serve as the perfect counter to Garrus’ question. Of course, his synapses must have fried because all he could manage was a questioning sound that was a cross between “huh” and “what” and was entirely unacceptable.

 

“The bandages and the medi-gel, not to mention the hand holding,” Garrus said, waving his hand at them. “Is this a precursor to an engagement of some sort?”

 

Before Kaidan could reject that claim vehemently--because if anything, John’s ego could use some taking down--John beat him to it.

 

“We’re finally going steady.”

 

“Congratulations,” Garrus said, in an earnest voice, even though Kaidan could tell that he was laughing on the inside.

 

Oh, well. If you can’t beat them...

 

“I’m still not putting out, John.”

 

He was expecting John to start whining, instead he began to laugh. Kaidan couldn’t begrudge the man his amusement, though. If anything, at least it made him a little less pale and damn if that didn’t make him relieved.

 

“And on that note, I better go,” John said, getting to his feet. He didn’t look like his usual self but at least he was steady on his feet. “Thanks for the help, Kaidan.”

 

“Are you sure you’ll be OK?”

 

“Yeah,” he nodded, smiling. He turned to look at Garrus. “I’ll see you around, Garrus.”

 

Kaidan got to his feet, motioning for Garrus to wait even as he walked John to the door.

 

“John, I meant what I said. Whatever it is that you’re involved in, just walk away. Please.”

 

John sighed, avoiding his gaze. “I can’t promise you that, Detective.”

 

Kaidan swallowed, nodding. With a last, somewhat conflicted look, John stepped out of the door, leaving Kaidan to stare at his retreating form.

 

He was unsteady on his feet as he made it back to the living room, where Garrus was sitting. He had to pause for a moment because Garrus was looking at a datapad with a grim expression on his face.

 

“What’s wrong?”

 

“Doctor Chakwas just sent some information to both of us. I think you might want to take a look at this.”

 

Kaidan took the datapad, scanning the pages to see all the information about Cerberus.

 

“Wait. They were an Alliance Black Ops team?”

 

“Yeah. And now they’re a pro-human extremist group,” Garrus wasn’t quite looking at him when he added, “Keep reading.”

 

He read until the end of the document, where the original team members were listed. He looked at all the unfamiliar faces until he got to the second to last one. His heart stuttered for a moment.

 

He was looking at the face of one John Shepard. Also known as John S.

 

 

*

 

 

“So, what do we know?” Kaidan asked, after they spent two hours collating all of the information. They should be at C-Sec HQ but Kaidan had called in earlier with the excuse that they had a lead they had to follow.

 

“We know there’s an organization called Cerberus whose members are former Alliance soldiers. We also know that Cerberus paid Donovan Hock a lot of money to get a number of guns smuggledonto the Citadel. “And we’ve just received intel from Bekenstein police that Donovan Hock has been found in his home with a gunshot wound to the chest.”

 

“Shit,” Kaidan sat heavily down on his couch. “Did they send you any details?”

 

Garrus pulled up his messages on his omni-tool to check. “Just that his body was posed. Whoever killed him stopped long enough to place him on the bed with his hands on his stomach.” Garrus shook his head. “All this over gun shipments? I would’ve thought Omega would be a more profitable market.”

 

“No, something’s not right.” Kaidan shook his head as he thought about something Bailey had said during their raid of that one warehouse. “Garrus, what if this isn’t a fight over the selling of guns? What if…what if it’s something more?”

 

“What do you mean?”

 

“We’re talking about an awful lot of guns, Garrus. It’ll flood the market. I think, maybe, they’re planning an attack.”

 

“What? On the Citadel?” Kaidan winced at Garrus’ tone. He knew how crazy it sounded. No one would dare pull something like that. “It’s suicide, Alenko. Not only because of C-Sec but the damn Citadel fleet is here as well.”

 

“Even for an Alliance Black Ops team? One that’s backed by people who could afford to buy large quantities of weapons from someone like Hock?”

 

“Damn it. We have to warn the Executor.” Garrus punched in the details into his omni-tool and they both waited for the call to connect.

 

“Garrus, there’s only one person who ties this whole thing together.” Kaidan said as they waited.

 

“Kaidan, I don’t think...”

 

“Look, John is the only person on the Citadel with a direct link to Cerberus. He’s got ties with Hock,” Kaidan pointed at the datapad containing the information from Bekenstein’s spaceport.

 

“We only know that he went to Bekenstein, we don’t know for sure that he went to see Hock.”

 

“Fine. Then how about this? I sent in the scans that Doctor Chakwas did on John’s wounds. They were gunshot wounds, Garrus. And they’re unique because only one gun in the whole galaxy can make those type of wounds. The Eviscerator, the same type of gun that Hock has been smuggling.”

 

“Just because he was shot with the gun doesn’t mean that he handled it, Alenko.”

 

“Hell, maybe he’s the one who shot Hock.”

 

“I really doubt that he would’ve survived a trip from Bekenstein with that kind of wound, Kaidan. Besides, the crime scene was bloodless and from what I could see earlier, John was bleeding all over the place,” Garrus pointed out, he cursed when he realized that his call wasn’t going through. “Probably sitting in one of his morning meetings,” Garrus muttered, taking a long drink from his glass.

 

“Why are you defending him?”

 

“Why are _you_ so convinced that he’s guilty?” Garrus countered. When Kaidan began to laugh in disbelief, Garrus sighed and set his glass down. “Look, remember the story I told you about Dr. Saleon?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“I may have neglected to mention a couple of things.”

 

“What things?” Kaidan asked, instantly wary.

 

“When we got there, I was ready to take him out. I didn’t want to bring him back to the Citadel and risk having him escape again.”

 

That...wasn’t something that Kaidan wanted to hear. They had their number of run-ins with criminals and it ended up with one or both of them having to shoot, but that happened because there was no other alternative.

 

What Garrus was saying was something else entirely. That wasn’t justice.

 

“John stopped me,” Garrus said, slowly. “He said that I’d be doing what the bad guys were doing. He said I was better than that,” he looked up, stared straight at Kaidan’s face. “And he was right. That was the reason why I came back to the Citadel instead of handing my resignation to...I don’t know, become a vigilante on Omega or something.”

 

“That’s...that still doesn’t excuse everything else, Garrus.”

 

“I know.”

 

Both their comms sounded, startling them. The alert from C-Sec HQ made them both look up.

 

“What the hell?”

 

“This is Bailey. C-Sec is under attack. Send reinforcements. I repeat, C-Sec is under attack.”

 

“Bailey? What’s going on?”

 

“Alenko? Is that you?”

 

“Vakarian here, too.”

 

“Shit. Am I glad to hear from you.”

 

“What’s the situation?”

 

“We’re being overrun by a damn army. There was a situation by the docks so half of the guys went down there. We’re pinned down in here.”

 

“We’re on our way,” Kaidan said, nodding at Garrus, who was already heading for Kaidan’s stash of weapons.

 

“Wait, Alenko, there’s one more thing.”

 

“What is it?”

 

“That boy of yours? John?”

 

“What about him?”

 

“He rushed in here earlier, helped me and Lamont out of a tricky situation. He’s gone up to check on the Executor, though.”

 

Kaidan could feel his entire body become cold even as he stared at Garrus. “Bailey, where does the Council go when there’s an emergency like this?”

 

“No idea but I’d imagine the Executor would know.”

 

“Yeah,” Kaidan breathed, still looking at Garrus. His partner, on the other hand, was shaking his head at Kaidan.

 

“No, whatever you’re thinking? No, Alenko.”

 

“We’ll argue later. Right now, we’ve got to go to HQ,” into his comm, he said, “Hang in there, Bailey.”

 

 

*

 

 

They entered through the cargo bay, pausing for a moment to check on the two guards on the floor. Garrus shook his head.

 

“Let’s keep moving.”

 

They followed the sound of gunfire into the next section, one corridor was sealed shut and they could hear more gunfire from there but the other one was open and they pressed their backs behind the wall before taking a quick look at the scene. There were maybe a handful of Cerberus troops fighting a group of C-Sec officers.

 

It would’ve been an even match if it weren’t for the two turrets that one of the Cerberus engineers had rigged up.

 

Luckily, they had the element of surprise on their side. Kaidan didn’t even need to look at Garrus, knowing exactly what to do. The first shot easily took out one engineer and, in the chaos, Cerberus thought it was the group’s doing. Just as Garrus dispatched the second engineer, Kaidan overloaded both turrets.

 

It didn’t take too long for Cerberus to realize that they were fighting a two front war. And while they tried to regroup, they were gunned down.

 

“You guys sure took your time,” Bailey said, standing up. The other three officers with him quickly checked on the Cerberus team, stripping them of guns and heat sinks.

 

“We need to get to the Executor,” Kaidan said, quickly.

 

“He’s in his office, you can check the monitors,” Bailey pointed at the far side of the room, where the security monitors were. Kaidan quickly rushed over, searching for the right camera. He had a moment to sigh in relief as he watched Pallin in his office, armed and ready. He glimpsed at the feed from another camera, eyes quickly widening when he noticed that John was running down the corridor towards Pallin’s office.

 

It was in that precise moment that the feeds were cut.

 

“Garrus, we need to go. Now.”

 

“Pallin’s office?”

 

Kaidan nodded. He turned to look at Bailey, who immediately said, “We’ll take care of things down here.”

 

“There are some officers down the other corridor. Help them and then get out.”

 

“Yessir,” Bailey muttered, but Kaidan didn’t have time to apologize, already heading for the stairs. They had to save Pallin.

 

 

*

 

 

The next floor had them going against some Cerberus stragglers, ones that lingered in the offices for who knew what. One of the engineers that Kaidan shot was fiddling with the electric panel. They were probably trying to shut the power down. 

 

“Just what we need, a terrorist group that wants to fight in the dark. How romantic,” huffed Garrus. Kaidan managed to smother his chuckles before they paused as they heard more gunfire ahead. They moved quickly but silently, taking care with all the papers and casings and whatever else on the floor.

 

Garrus moved ahead of him, keeping close to the wall as they approached another doorway that would lead into a large hall. The stairs were close by so if whoever was there didn’t need their help, they could quickly move on.

 

No such luck, though.

 

“They’re pinned down,” Garrus said. Kaidan ducked down to peer around the corner.

 

He was right. There were four C-Sec officers, Kaidan recognized Lang as one of them, and probably around twelve Cerberus soldiers. Their colleagues looked tired already and from what Kaidan could see, Lang was probably wounded, judging from the way he favored his left side.

 

“I’ll flank these guys and you go upstairs and get our guy.”

 

“You sure?”

 

“Positive.”

 

“No heroics, Vakarian.”

 

“No promises, Alenko.”

 

Kaidan snorted, hearing the promise despite his partner’s words. He quickly rushed up the stairs, even as Garrus made his way down the stairway and behind the enemy. The last thing he saw before he turned the corner was Garrus aiming his sniper rifle and firing.

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan was careful as he rushed up the stairs, taking note of his surroundings. By the time he reached the floor for the Executor’s office, he could see that the door was open and there was some sort of altercation inside, if the sound of shouting and things being thrown was any clue. He moved swiftly but quietly, pressing his back against the wall near the door.

 

He took a deep breath, readied his gun and went inside.

 

John had Harkin pinned against the wall, his forearm pressed against the man’s throat. He had a gun to Harkin’s temple and he was snarling.

 

“John?”

 

John looked away from Harkin, a fierce look on his face as he swiveled to look at Kaidan. The look vanished, replaced by one of confusion and then of relief. “Thank god you’re all right.”

 

Kaidan swallowed, looking at the way Harkin was turning purple in the face. He looked down and froze when he saw Executor Pallin lying in a pool of his own blood. He levelled his gun at John. “What’s going on, John?”

 

“He killed the Executor!” Harkin managed to gasp out. “Shoot him!”

 

“You can stop lying now, Harkin,” John snarled, shoving his arm harder against Harkin’s throat.

 

“John, stop that, right now!” John turned and froze at the sight of the gun pointed at him.

 

“Kaidan, I...”

 

“Move away from him. Please.” John swallowed, gaze drifting to Harkin. When he looked back at Kaidan, he finally nodded.

 

Kaidan breathed a sigh of relief, even though John still had a gun pointed at Harkin.

 

“What the hell are you doing, Alenko? Shoot him! Shoot him now!” Harkin shouted, pointing at John.

 

“I will put this bullet in your head if you don’t shut up right now, Harkin,” John snarled, but his hand was steady.

 

“Everyone take it easy,” Kaidan said, eyes trained on Harkin, though his gun was aimed at John. When his gaze drifted back to John, his chest tightened at the determined look on John’s face. The one that told Kaidan that John wasn’t going to drop his gun.

 

“Alenko! Take him out! He’s trying to kill me!”

 

“Shut up, Harkin!” Kaidan shouted, looking at John, trying to make sense of this whole situation.

 

“Put the gun down, John.”

 

“I can’t do that, Kaidan.” His voice might be steady now, but Kaidan saw a flicker of something in those familiar eyes.

 

“I found the list,” Kaidan said, instead, trying to stall. Garrus had said his ETA was around fifteen minutes. If he could stall long enough, maybe this wouldn’t end with someone being dead. Despite who John may be, Kaidan couldn’t help the feeling his chest, even as his head told him that he was an idiot for falling in love with a criminal, one who called down hell on an unsuspecting Citadel.

 

“Did you send it the Alliance?”

 

“I,” Kaidan choked for a moment, though he was grateful to see that his hands remained steady. “Why would I do that?”

 

“Damn it, Alenko!” John threw a short irritated glance his way before focusing on Harkin again. “I thought I gave you enough clues,” he shook his head, voice dropping down to a murmur, “I could’ve sworn I gave you enough.”

 

“Look, John, whatever it is that’s going on, we can settle this, OK? So just put down your gun and call off your men and we’ll...” Kaidan couldn’t finish his sentence because John was staring at him with a look of betrayal on his face.

 

“My men? Wait, you really think that I’m responsible for all of this?”

 

Kaidan could feel his stomach clench at the hurt in John’s voice but he gritted his teeth and kept calm. He couldn’t afford to back down now. He didn’t know who John Shepard was. For all he knew, John could have been stringing him along, trying to derail his investigation. What he uncovered so far seemed to point that way.

 

The harsh bark of laughter from Harkin reminded him of their current situation.

 

“Hear that, lover boy? Not even your little boyfriend believes you,” he sneered, waving a hand at Kaidan. “Put the damn gun down.”

 

“What? So you’ll get the chance to pull out your gun and shoot us both? I don’t think so, Harkin.” John was fully focused on Harkin now, ignoring Kaidan entirely. He was bracing himself, Kaidan noted with a note of panic. As if ready to shoot.

 

“John, don’t do it.”

 

“He’s the one working for Cerberus, Kaidan,” John said, glaring at Harkin. “He brought them in here.”

 

“John, I’ve read the files. I know all about your Black Ops team, how you all went rogue.”

 

“I know what you’ve read, Kaidan. But I gave you that list, I left that disk on purpose during our date. All of the other clues, they were from me.”

 

“Then why are you...why did you...”

 

John looked almost desperate now, Kaidan could see it in his eyes even though his face was calmly blank. “I’m not authorized to give you all the details and I’ll tell you as soon as you’re given clearance. But, Kaidan. You have to trust me. Please.”

 

Kaidan was torn, not even hearing Harkin as he shouted and cursed. A part of him didn’t want to believe John’s words. But his gut was telling him a different story and if there was something Kaidan trusted more than anything or anyone, that was his instinct.

 

“Okay,” he said, slowly lowering his gun. John sighed in relief, nodding his head.

 

“Thank you.”

 

They both ignored Harkin’s screaming. It was because of this that Kaidan failed to hear the sound of people running just outside the door. When Garrus burst through the open door with his assault rifle ready, with some blood on his face and on his armor, several things happened at once.

 

John’s aim faltered, the gun in his hand shifted slightly to the side, enough that it wasn’t pointed directly at Harkin anymore. Harkin saw this opportunity to take out the pistol he’d been hiding to point it at John’s head. Even as Kaidan shouted and tried to raise his gun, he could feel terror down to his bones, knowing that he was going to be too late as Harkin’s finger began to pull the trigger.

 

A gun fired but even in his panic, Kaidan registered that it came from behind him and not from Harkin. When Harkin crumpled to the floor, a mess from an explosive round to the face, Kaidan immediately looked at John.

 

He was cursing up a storm. There was some blood on his clothes but Kaidan noted that it probably came from Harkin. He couldn’t quite swallow the ragged sigh of relief that John was alright.

 

“Thanks, Garrus,” Kaidan breathed, closing his eyes in relief.

 

“That wasn’t me,” Garrus said, slowly. He slowly entered the office and Kaidan could see that there was someone standing behind him.

 

A salarian in full armor stepped into the room, the gun in his hand glowed slightly, telling Kaidan that he’d been the one to fire the shot that took out Harkin.

 

“And you are?”

 

“Jondum Bau, Special Tactics and Recon,” He replied, nodding his head once. “Are you alright?”

 

“Bau,” John grinned. “You don’t know how happy I am to see you.”

 

“I was informed by Nihlus that you require some assistance.” Bau looked down at what was left of Harkin, painted with crimson on the floor. “Is this our man?”

 

“One of many,” John nodded, looking at Harkin with distaste. “He passed all the information to Cerberus and smuggled the weapons in. Not to mention hid all of it under C-Sec’s nose. He might not look the part but he was running the damn show. Killed the Executor, too.”

 

“You’ve obtained the necessary proof, I take it?”

 

“Would you mind telling us what’s going on? Aside from the dead C-Sec investigator on the floor,” Garrus asked, voice laced with sarcasm. “Harkin was scum but now you’re telling me he’s the one behind this?”

 

“He was running the Op for Cerberus. Technically, he’s not the only one behind this,” John explained, rummaging around the Executor’s drawer to take out a couple of pistols and enough heat sink for a short battle.

 

“Cerberus? The people you’re working for?” Kaidan couldn’t help the accusatory tone, even after John’s plea earlier. When John looked at him he looked more angry than hurt, which was thankfully something Kaidan could work with. He knew how to deal with anger.

 

“That is incorrect, Detective,” Bau said, casting a glance at Shepard. “We are unable to provide you with the full details but I can tell you that his loyalties lie with the Alliance and the Citadel Council.”

 

“Except I’m not being paid by the Council,” John pointed out, some of the anger disappearing as he grinned at Bau.

 

“You have an interesting way of asking for a raise, John,” Garrus commented, accepting a medi-gel from Kaidan. “And that’s not much of an explanation.”

 

“That may be so, Detective Vakarian, but unfortunately we don’t have the luxury of time.” Bau glanced at John. “Shepard, are the Councilors secure?”

 

The name threw him off for a moment. He was so used to “John” that the name “Shepard” seemed so different. It wasn’t bad, though. If anything, it suited him.

 

“Yeah. Locked them up in a panic room,” John nodded. Bau paused for a moment to stare at him. “What? It’s for their own safety!” John exclaimed, shrugging and not bothering to hide his smirk.

 

“I suppose they can always yell at you after we’ve saved their lives.” Bau said. Kaidan couldn’t get a read on him. He wasn’t sure if Bau was annoyed by this or not. “I’ll secure the Council while you three take care of Cerberus.”

 

“Oh, sure, let us handle the army while you’re off babysitting,” John said, dryly. Despite his words, he was already moving towards the hallway, making sure that it was clear before he motioned the rest of them forward.

 

“Would you prefer to be on escort duty, then?” Bau asked.

 

John raised an eyebrow. “Where’s the fun in that?” He and Bau exchanged quick nods before Bau rushed off to protect the Council. “So, just the three of us and a hundred strong army,” John said, tone casual. As usual, his eyes told a different story. There was tension around them and a look of wariness that came from what happened earlier. It was as if he was expecting Kaidan to tell him to go to hell.

 

Well, if John thought he could disappear before he told Kaidan anything, then he had another thing coming.

 

“You better stay alive, _Shepard_ , because after we win this, you owe us an explanation,” Kaidan said. He didn’t add, “and maybe you can let me apologize for accusing you of orchestrating this.”

 

John’s face went slack with surprise but then lit up like a damn Christmas tree, so Kaidan knew they’d be all right.

 

“After we’re done here, you’re allowed to slap those handcuffs on me, put me over your lap and spank me silly,” John said with a solemn voice. Kaidan shook his head at him while Garrus snorted in laughter.

 

“Or we could just shove you into a cell, without the handcuffs, while you think of what story to tell.”

 

“You never let me have any fun, Alenko,” John said with a sigh.

 

“I let you have too much fun, if anything. I let you get away with everything these days,” Kaidan replied, checking his weapon. He looked up at John to see that same expression he made the night they went out drinking. Kaidan swallowed thickly. He had to focus because they were going to get out of this alive. If only so he could figure out who the real John Shepard was.

 

“And it’s not Alenko,” he continued, glad that his voice sounded steady.

 

Shepard chuckled, nodding his head. “I know, it’s Detective...” Kaidan didn’t let him finish.

 

“It’s Kaidan, actually.” There was a moment, a very charged moment, where they just stared at each other.

 

It was broken when Garrus cleared his throat and said, “That was beautiful. Now can we focus on the Cerberus army, please? I want to be home in time for dinner.”

 

 

*

 

 

There was a lot of chatter on the comms as soon as Garrus and Kaidan switched theirs back online. Most of it was Bailey barking orders and other C-Sec officers either shouting out their location or affirming whatever orders they were given.

 

“Bailey, are you safe?”

 

“Alenko? Did you get to the Executor?”

 

Kaidan glanced at Garrus before replying, “We were too late.”

 

“Damn these bastards.” The rest of the comm went silent before someone shouted something in the background. The comm exploded with chatter once more and Kaidan could barely make out Bailey’s voice. “Alenko, Vakarian?”

 

“What is it?”

 

“We’ve just got word that a company of those soldiers are entering C-Sec through the docking bay.”

 

“Damn it. Hold your position, we’ll be right there,” Garrus ordered. They picked up the pace, rushing towards the stairs.

 

“Negative, Vakarian. We had to get the casualties out. We’re no longer in the building.” Kaidan skidded to a stop, catching himself on the wall. Shepard, who was on point, turned around to stand beside Kaidan.

 

“That’s great,” Shepard muttered. “Can we fight our way out?”

 

“That’s not looking possible. Your best bet would be to head to the roof,” Bailey said, huffing slightly.

 

“You’re kidding,” Shepard said, flatly.

 

“Afraid not. We can’t get to you, they’ve sealed the doors from this side. I’ve radioed in for backup and we’ll try to get through from the Presidium.”

 

“But it’ll take a while,” Kaidan said.

 

“Looks like we need to head to higher ground,” John said with a grimace. They took the stairs instead of the elevator, not liking the thought of Cerberus getting their hands on the controls.

 

Unfortunately, the stairway that they were on would only go up to the sixth floor. They had to cut across the entire floor to get the stairways that would lead them to the tenth floor and would have to cut across that floor as well. Kaidan was really starting to hate whoever designed this building.

 

“Did they send all of their soldiers here?”

 

“No,” Shepard shouted, over the roar of the gunfight. “They’ve split up most of their army into different squads. There’s quite a large number here but the bulk of it is fighting by the docking bay, where all the military vessels are.”

 

“What the hell are they trying to do?” Garrus asked, sniping a Cerberus soldier who was armed with a rocket launcher.

 

“Take out C-Sec and gain control of the Citadel Fleet. They’ll have the Destiny Ascension and the Citadel on their hands.”

 

“We got that from the evidence but...How would they even do that? They would need...”

 

“A lot of resources.”

 

“Not to mention...”

 

“A huge army.”

 

“Yeah,” Kaidan breathed, shaking his head. “How long have they been planning this?”

 

“No idea. The guys behind the screen probably had a long time to plan this, even though any file on Cerberus would say that it was formed...”

 

“Three years ago and was formerly an Alliance Black Ops team.”

 

“Is this another human courtship ritual?” Garrus asked, taking out yet another soldier and sounding quite amused. Kaidan was pretty sure his amusement didn’t come from killing the bad guys.

 

“What thing?”

 

“Finishing each other’s sentences. I’ve been told by a reliable source that it’s a custom for old, married couples.”

 

Kaidan ignored the way Shepard sank down to the floor next to him, trying to muffle his laughter. Instead of hitting his partner and his...Shepard...and leaving him to drive off the entire Cerberus army by himself, Kaidan turned his attention back to Cerberus.

 

It was a little too late because as soon as he got up, a bullet from a sniper rifle pierced through his barrier and slammed right into his shoulder. He hit the ground with a thud, winded. No matter how many times he’d been shot at, he’d never get used to the sensation.

 

He could hear both Garrus and Shepard calling his name and he hissed in pain as he was dragged towards where they were hunkered down. Shepard released the catch on his shoulder guard, wincing at Kaidan’s hiss of pain and the way he squirmed as the medi-gel hit his wound.

 

“Hammerhead round but it’s a through and through. You’ll be fine,” Shepard said, even as Kaidan sighed in relief as the gel began to work its magic.

 

“I’m not fine. I’m angry,” grunted Kaidan, slapping another medi-gel on the wound. Shepard laughed, though it was anything but happy.

 

“You must be OK, then,” he said, slowly. Despite the gunfire all around them, Kaidan took a moment to look at him.

 

He couldn’t quite believe that fifteen minutes ago he had a gun pointed at Shepard’s face. That they were here, trying to fight their through an army, made everything feel a little surreal.

 

“We’ll be OK.”

 

“Yeah?” It wasn’t delivered in Shepard’s perfect deadpan. If anything, Shepard actually sounded quietly hopeful. Kaidan was suddenly reminded of their coffee date, the first time that he saw another side of John. Possibly the first time that he actually saw the real John Shepard.

 

“Yeah.”

 

“If you two are done flirting, maybe we can try some crowd dispersion?” Garrus asked, voice dry.

 

“With what?” Kaidan asked, looking around for more ammo. Or a heavy weapon of some kind.

 

“With this,” Shepard replied, taking out two inferno grenades.

 

“And when were you going to share this with the class, Shepard?”

 

“Eventually,” Shepard said, shrugging his shoulders and smiling that Cheshire cat grin again.

 

“Maybe we’ll stay alive long enough for you to give me some as a birthday present,” mused Garrus, even as Shepard popped out of hiding to send the grenade flying in a high arc, landing smack in the middle of the enemy.

 

There was a pause in the gunfire before someone shrieked “grenade!” The explosion was deafening for a moment, but they waited for another sound. Sure enough, the screams of pain as soldiers burst into flame soon followed.

 

“Let’s go.”

 

It was a mad rush to go through the next set of doors, weaving through the screaming soldiers. They used the flames and smoke and screams as distraction from the soldiers who were untouched by the grenades.

 

Kaidan quickly hacked into the doors while John and Garrus covered him. Even as he typed, his mind was thinking of other things. He knew that the faster they move forward, the faster they’d be trapped. Going upwards meant they’d hit the roof soon enough. What were they going to do once they reach it? Barricade the doors? There was enough salvage up there to hide behind should Cerberus break through the doors, but how long would they have until they were outgunned?

 

The door finally opened but Kaidan cursed when he realized that he was going to find out all the answers to that question soon enough. The roof access door was ahead of them.

 

“Run for it!” Shepard shouted, taking out what looked to be his last two grenades.

 

Kaidan didn’t need to be told twice. He rushed forward, feeling Garrus next to him. Thankfully the door was unlocked, it always was and despite the number of times Kaidan would complain about it and cited security reasons, he was very glad that no one had listened to him.

 

 Kaidan and Garrus rushed through while Shepard slammed the doors shut and activated the security locks. The door was reinforced so even with Cerberus on the other side, they would still need at least an hour to get that door open. Hopefully it would be long enough for backup to arrive.

 

“I guess now we get to play the waiting game,” Shepard said, grinning.

 

Kaidan and Garrus shared a look, knowing too well that saying something like that only invited trouble. Before Garrus could make a joke about famous last words--and Kaidan knew that one was coming--they all heard a peculiar sound.

 

“What’s that noise?” Garrus asked, as they quickly turned to look at the open platform ahead of them. It wasn’t a very defensible position, with the exception of perhaps the crates that someone had stacked up but forgot to bring down. There were a number of mechs left outside, so they were probably some of the older mechs that they had on hand for security.

 

The deep rumbling and whirling sound was getting closer and closer.

 

“I could be wrong,” Shepard said, slowly. “But I think that’s a...”

 

“Gunship,” Kaidan finished in a strangled voice even as the gunship appeared in front of them. “Get down!” He took cover behind the crates, waving at Shepard and Garrus to do the same.

 

“Oh crap.” Garrus muttered as he quickly ducked down, just as John threw his last grenade at it and then vaulted over the steel crates. There was a fizz as the ship’s shielding blew but it was soon followed by its opening salvo. The bullets from the ship’s weapons system sounded like thunder as it hit the crates, followed by a missile that thankfully missed. The air was filled with thick smoke and even with the breeze, it was difficult to see.

 

“Are you kidding me?” Kaidan managed to choke out, gulping for air. Shepard gritted his teeth. Kaidan was instantly reminded that Shepard was shot only last night. Even though he was most likely healed by now, he had new injuries now, there was a trickle of blood from a cut above his eyebrow.

 

They were all injured at this point, whether by a lucky shot or a ricochet or even debris.

 

Shepard finally noticed Kaidan’s stare and he quirked his lips, saying, “I guess this is a bad time to tell you that I’m out of grenades?”

 

 “How are we on heat sinks?” Garrus asked.

 

“Low. Very low,” Shepard replied.

 

“You’re really on a roll with these bad news, Shepard.”

 

“Well, I’m about to add more. Hate to say it, but we can’t last an hour with that thing.”

 

Shepard was right. He didn’t have to say it because Kaidan was already thinking the same thing. Still, there might be something they could do, something they could use. Kaidan looked around at the crates. They were sealed shut and it would take too much time to get them open. Not to mention he’d have to be out of cover if he tried.

 

His gaze landed on the mechs. Maybe he could...He couldn’t, could he?

 

It was stupid idea, but what did they have to lose? The gunship’s shielding was down but they were out of thermal clips. They were in no state to draw away gunfire to let someone look around for any dropped thermal clips. They could try peppering it with tech powers—he and Garrus both had their overloads and Shepard had apparently picked up energy drain from who knew where—but that would only draw out the fight.

 

Judging from their conditions, already having decimated most of the Cerberus army, the sooner they finished this, the better.

 

Kaidan pointed at the Fenris mech by Shepard’s feet. “Help me out with that.”

 

Shepard gave him a confused look, but thankfully didn’t ask any questions.

 

It didn’t take him long to rig the mech.

 

“Makeshift bomb?” Shepard asked, confused.

 

“Unless that thing can float, I don’t think that’ll work, Alenko,” Garrus said.

 

“Garrus, can you keep him busy? Overload him or something?”

 

Garrus looked like he was about to ask him something, but changed his mind. Instead, he went back to focusing on the helicopter. While Kaidan was trying to figure out how he was going to detonate the damn thing, he felt Shepard shifting beside him before what seemed to be wiring was shoved his way.

 

“Here, try this.”

 

On closer inspection, Kaidan could see that the wiring was designed for a bomb and that with it, Shepard also had a detonator.

 

“Why the hell do you have this with you?”

 

Shepard shrugged. “I like to be ready. I was keeping that for a special occasion,” he waved his hand, smirking. “This seemed like a special occasion.”

 

“I think this is my second favorite gift, after the gardenias,” Kaidan said.

 

“That vibrator could’ve been your third favorite gift. Too bad you had to throw it away. I spent Cerberus credits on that thing, you know.” Kaidan stole a glance at Shepard, surprised that he didn’t see the usual teasing smirk, it looked far too soft and fond for his usual grin.

 

Garrus didn’t even pause from his assault when he asked, “Do I even want to know?”

 

“No, you don’t.” Kaidan laughed quietly, but worked quickly to attach the detonator to the wiring inside of the mech. When he was sure that everything was done correctly, he flipped the switch and turned the damn thing live. The problem was, he needed to get the mech high enough. His throwing aim was usually better with things high up.

 

“Could you get it up there?” Kaidan pointed to the top of one of the crates.

 

“I can try.” Shepard closed his eyes, glowed blue and the mech slowly drifted up. He set it down gently on the crate. The moment that he did, the glow around him disappeared and he slid down to the floor, visibly exhausted. “Okay. I’m tapped out.”

 

Kaidan didn’t reply, though he did reach out to squeeze Shepard’s shoulder gently, earning him a soft but tired smile.

 

“Are you good, Garrus?” Kaidan asked.

 

“Can’t keep this up forever,” Garrus said, after yet another overload attempt.

 

Kaidan looked at the mech, plotted the trajectory in his head and threw it with all his powers straight at the helicopter.

 

The sound of its window shattering was like the sound of victory.

 

Kaidan managed a grim smile before ducking down. “Get down!”

 

The helicopter wavered in the air for half a second and Kaidan pressed down on the detonator.

 

“Kaidan, did you just kill that helicopter with a Fenris mech?” Shepard asked with quiet awe. Even Garrus was speechless.

 

“I was out of bullets,” Kaidan replied, laughing with relief and a hint of disbelief.  He smiled at Garrus, who had recovered enough to shake his head.

 

“That marriage proposal? It’s back on, Alenko,” Shepard said with a wide grin.

 

While Kaidan stared at Shepard and laughed, they could hear the sound of sirens moving closer and closer.

 

Garrus huffed a quiet laugh, getting slowly to his feet, even as every single muscle in his body protested. “I’ll leave you two to it, then. I think there’s an ambulance out there with my name on it.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan sat inside the ambulance, a salarian paramedic poking at his injured shoulder. In another ambulance, Shepard was having his own examination. He smiled politely at the asari paramedic and even though Kaidan couldn’t hear what was being said, the way she was smiling showed that she was interested.

 

Before he could muster enough energy to be annoyed at himself for the spark of jealousy, he noticed Nihlus and a human in full Alliance uniform walking towards Shepard. He looked desperately at the salarian, “Are we done yet?”

 

“I’m doing this as fast as I can, Detective Alenko. I’m afraid you just have to be patient.”

 

“Take your time. We wouldn’t want it to scar. It’ll ruin his delicate good looks,” Garrus said, leaning against the ambulance.

 

“What’s the verdict?”

 

“Well, the Captain is not happy, of course, but I think he’s more relieved than angry at this point. Twenty five fatalities, but considering what just happened, that’s a good thing. He’s demanding a complete report and everything we’ve gathered on Cerberus.”

 

“Of course,” Kaidan sighed.

 

“There’s more to this.”

 

“Yeah. Somehow, this plan seems too elaborate, not to mention ambitious. I mean, taking control the Citadel and hijacking the Destiny Ascension? Even if they did succeed and they got to phase 2 of their plans, they must know that someone from the Alliance was going to figure out that the batarians aren’t the ones to blame. I mean, those of us on the Citadel would’ve told them the real story!”

 

Garrus made a sound. “Captain just told me that there were explosives planted in key areas. I think that after stealing the ships, they were planning on blowing up the Citadel.”

 

“What? Get rid of the evidence and the witnesses?”

 

“Maybe. It still feels too ambitious to me.”

 

“You think they’re trying for something else? But wait,” Kaidan held up his hand, much to the annoyance of the paramedic. “We don’t even know who’s behind all this. Cerberus, yeah, but that’s just the organization. Who’s the person in charge of all this?”

 

“That’s what Commander Shepard has been trying to find out,” replied the Alliance man who had been speaking to John earlier.

 

“Can we help you, sir?” Garrus asked, polite but wary.

 

“Rear Admiral Anderson. You must be Detectives Vakarian and Alenko?”

 

“Yes, sir,” Kaidan said, straightening. He tried not to salute. He may have joined C-Sec instead of the Alliance Navy, but there’s still a part of him that regretted that decision, despite everything.

 

“So, Shepard is still part of the Alliance?” Garrus asked.

 

“Yes,” the Admiral nodded. “When his Special Ops team was contemplating going rogue, Commander Shepard immediately reported this to Admiral Hackett. It was Hackett who told him to work undercover, pretending to go along with their plans while being our inside man. We didn’t know what Cerberus was doing, but thanks to Shepard we know all about how deep this infection goes.”

 

“The names,” Kaidan whispered to himself before saying, “The list he left behind, that was a list of Cerberus agents, wasn’t it?”

 

“Indeed, Detective. Shepard has been undercover for over two years, he had to sell himself as a different person to Cerberus and had to play the part. While it’s a damn shame that we had to lose our source on the inside, we are gaining some political traction thanks to this.”

 

“What do you mean, Admiral?”

 

“Shepard has been investigating this case for months, trying to find out what Cerberus was up to. At the same time, he’s been working with Nihlus over there.”

 

“The Spectre,” Garrus offered. Anderson paused for a moment, looking at both Garrus and Kaidan.

 

“Yes. Well, suffice to say that working with Shepard has impressed Nihlus enough that he’s put forward Shepard’s name to the Council for Spectre. All this in only a couple of months, too,” Anderson muttered, the last part directed to himself, or so Kaidan thought.

 

“So Shepard’s going to be the first human Spectre?”

 

“Looks that way,” Anderson said with a satisfied nod.

 

“That’ll change Citadel politics.” Garrus made a curious sound. “Things are sure going to be interesting from now on.”

 

Still, there was something that bothered Kaidan.

 

“Sorry, sir, but why are you telling us this? Shouldn’t this be kept a secret?”

 

“I’m telling you this because Shepard’s going to need a team once he’s a Spectre.”

 

“I thought Spectres usually work alone?”

 

“They tend to. Not all of them do, however. And Shepard,” Anderson paused, laughing quietly. “Well, Shepard has always liked working in a team. Even while working undercover, he had managed to put a ragtag team together to uncover this whole mess.”

 

“I still don’t see,” Kaidan couldn’t finish, Anderson cut him off before he could.

 

“He requested that you two be in his team. The Alliance knew about the Cerberus threat but we’ve always had restrictions on what we could do. Now the Council is also aware of them and we finally have the allies and resources we need.”

 

“Do we have to give our answer now?”

 

Anderson looked amused as he replied, “No, I’ll leave that with Shepard. I better get going, I’m afraid I have a meeting with the Council that I can’t put off any longer.”

 

“Thank you, Admiral,” Kaidan said, just as Anderson was about to leave. Anderson nodded once and left.

 

“Working alongside a Spectre, huh? I like the sound of that,” mused Garrus.

 

“I’m sure you do.” Kaidan laughed, humorlessly.

 

“Wait. You’re not going to accept?”

 

“I...” He shook his head, tired all of a sudden. “I don’t know, Garrus. There are a lot of unanswered questions here.”

 

“Then I suggest you go get your answer.”

 

Kaidan turned to look at him, about to ask what he meant by that but Garrus was pointing at Shepard, who was making his way to them, arm in a sling.

 

“Garrus,” Shepard said, nodding his head. He paused for a moment, hesitant as he said, “Detective Alenko.”

 

“After today, I thought I told you to call me Kaidan, Shepard. John. Or whatever your name is.”

 

Shepard looked pained when he heard those words. Enough that Kaidan actually felt guilty for saying it for about half a second. Then he reminded himself that out of the things that they got wrong about Shepard, one thing was right. Shepard was undercover, which meant anything he told them before was most likely just lies.

 

“I was hoping we could talk, actually. Somewhere far away from C-Sec and gunfire and Garrus. No offense, Garrus.”

 

“Don’t worry about it, Shepard.”

 

“I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

 

“You said I owe you an explanation, right? Well, this your chance to get the full story,” Shepard offered, he crossed his arms, shrugging his shoulders. He looked so awkward, tense and so unlike John. It was familiar and unfamiliar at the same time. Kaidan hated the way the uncertainty and the underlying anger faded when faced with this version of John Shepard.

 

He sighed.

 

Besides, it would serve as closure to this roller coaster ride.

 

“Alright. You know Apollo Cafe?”

 

“The one in Presidium Common?”

 

“Yeah. Let’s meet there tomorrow, noon.”

 

“OK. I’ll see you then,” Shepard nodded at Garrus, glanced wordlessly at Kaidan and left.

 

“I’ve seen you do awkward before, Alenko, but that must be the worst one yet.”

 

“Not now, Garrus,” Kaidan said, tiredly. “I’m in no mood for jokes.”

 

“Alright, partner. Just this once.”

 

 

*

 

 

Kaidan arrived early and found himself a table. He was a little anxious, tapping his fingers lightly on the tabletop. He had about ten minutes to calm himself down, which should be enough. At least, that was the plan.

 

When he looked up and saw Shepard, it was clear that they both had the same idea. He saw Shepard’s eyes widen when he spotted Kaidan. Kaidan had opted for something casual, for once, his dark jeans and a navy shirt. Shepard, on the other hand, was wearing his Alliance blues.

 

It looked good on him. For the first time, he looked comfortable in his skin.

 

“Hey,” Shepard said, taking a seat. “Did you order yet?”

 

“I got coffee. Let’s just,” Kaidan stopped, trying to stay calm. “Let’s just get this over with, OK?”

 

Shepard looked like he wanted to argue for a moment but he nodded. He launched straight into the story. Most of it Kaidan had heard already from Anderson but there were more details now. Details from Shepard’s side.

 

He heard about the Black Ops team that Shepard was part of, the men and women who served with him. Not quite a family, but they were a cohesive unit. They were friends.

 

Somehow their team leader was approached by a mysterious benefactor and most of them were lured away with promises of endless resources and placing humanity at the top of the galactic food chain.

 

It also meant turning away from the Alliance and that wasn’t something Shepard wanted to be a part of. So he reported to Admiral Hackett and somehow he was told to act as an Alliance agent--because Shepard hated the word spy--and what was promised to be a month-long gig turned into three years.

 

Shepard stopped giving him too many details then. Only enough to tell him about being sent to Omega to help out with espionage as well as building alliances with the local merc groups. It was how he met Garrus and it was also how he managed to sabotage any alliance building by pissing off those same merc groups.

 

He paused several times, mostly during the parts where he had to meet with Kaidan. There was uncertainty in his voice, right before each pause. But the entire time he told the story, Shepard didn’t look away once.

 

It was probably an hour before the story was finished and Kaidan let the silence settle. Shepard was tense in his seat, like a man on trial, waiting for his verdict.

 

When did he become judge, jury and executioner, Kaidan thought to himself.

 

He really should stand up and walk away because he needed to process everything. It wasn’t a surprise that he couldn’t.

 

He hadn’t been able to do that even when Shepard was pretending to be a criminal. Facing the real Shepard, the one who still liked to tease and push Kaidan’s buttons, the one who cared enough to sit down and explain, and the one who had listened and trusted Kaidan while bullets were flying over their heads...Well, he really couldn’t walk away.

 

“I know you said it before, but I have to ask again. Is it John or Shepard?”

 

“Shepard’s fine,” Shepard said, looking relieved that Kaidan hadn’t decided to leave. He hesitated for a moment before continuing. “I’ve been John S. for too long. I need to get used to being Commander Shepard again.”

 

Kaidan could certainly understand that. Living in another man’s skin, pretending to be someone else. It was why he’d always declined going undercover. He had enough trouble being himself, why would he want to try and be other people?

 

“That whole thing, with your mission, approaching me,” he stopped, irritated at how this felt important to him. He wasn’t upset that Shepard was trying to use him to try and get C-Sec to piece everything together, not really. He was more upset that everything that Shepard did as John, was a lie.

 

No. That wasn’t it either.

 

The jokes and gag gifts and the leers, those were the lies. But those other moments, the tiny smiles, the thoughtful looks, the gardenias...those mattered. Were they lies as well?

 

Kaidan couldn’t voice his thoughts. Part of it was shame and the other part, well, he wasn’t about to set himself up for disappointment.

 

“Kaidan,” Shepard leaned forward and reached out. He hesitated for a moment before carefully placing his hand on Kaidan’s wrist. “I had to approach you for the mission, I’ll admit to that, but it wasn’t...It wasn’t all a lie, OK?”

 

Kaidan watched him carefully. The man seated in front of him didn’t use the expansive hand gestures that “John” had used. He sat quietly, though there was a faint thrum under his skin, a desperation. It was the look in his eyes that told his story, though.

 

It was the same look he had when he spoke about his life on Earth, when they were with Garrus at Flux, when Kaidan told him to be careful, and when Shepard had begged for his trust, yesterday, during their standoff.

 

“The gardenias?”

 

“Were from me,” Shepard said, a determined look in his eyes, a new expression. “Used my own credits. I didn’t use Cerberus funds or Alliance funds.”

 

Kaidan laughed, knowing that the relief was evident on his face and not caring for once. Well, Shepard wasn’t a criminal and if Shepard was going to be honest, Kaidan could do the same.

 

“OK.”

 

“We’re good?” Shepard asked, still hesitant. He squeezed Kaidan’s wrist, once.

 

“More than good, Shepard.”

 

And there it was, that same grin. It wasn’t anywhere near shy this time but it was still good to see. Still...

 

“Actually, no, I take that back. No, we’re not good, Shepard,” Kaidan said, shaking his head, feigning a sad look.

 

“Oh. Noted.” Shepard carefully let go of his hand. 

 

“You still owe me that date, you know.”

 

It was amusing to see Shepard’s expression change from downcast to relieved, though it was quickly replaced by a very bad imitation of a scowl. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

 

“Hey, you got to torture me for almost a month. I think this is fair.”

 

Shepard made a strangled sound in his throat, shaking his head. “You didn’t make it easy for a guy undercover, you know. I was only supposed to keep you distracted long enough to make it look like I was doing what Cerberus told me to and then drop all of the evidence on your lap.”

 

“So that month-long stint wasn’t part of the plan?”

 

Shepard chuckled softly, shaking his head, looking down at his hands on the table. “No, definitely not.”

 

“So about joining your team?”

 

“Garrus mentioned that you weren’t interested.” Shepard looked away, swallowing. Like he was bracing himself for rejection. Kaidan would smack some sense into him, but he had better things to do.

 

“Do we get health benefits? And paid leave?”

 

“I...you...” Kaidan smirked, liking the way Shepard was rendered speechless.

 

“What about the pay? I mean, I’m sure it’ll be better than C-Sec. Anything is better than C-Sec pay.”

 

“I’m pretty sure we’ll all be on the Council’s payroll.”

 

“If you’re going to be my boss, wouldn’t this be against protocol?”

 

“Spectres write their own rules, remember?” The grin on Shepard’s face was turning a little playful, not quite John’s smirk, but something even better. And one that spelled trouble.

 

“We’re not going to roleplay the lecherous boss and the reluctant assistant,” Kaidan warned, though he couldn’t quite hide his grin.

 

“Why don’t we start with partners first? Then we’ll work our way back to C-Sec officer and the unruly criminal.”

 

“Oh god,” Kaidan groaned, covering his face.

 

“I’ll even let you cuff me properly this time.”

 

He had a feeling that Shepard could go on for hours. Before he could be subjected to more rounds of bad one-liners, he grabbed a hold of Shepard’s collar and pulled him in for a kiss, silencing him. And if the catcalls that he was hearing sounded a little too familiar, he’d worry about that later.

 

After all, he just saved the Citadel _and_ he got to kiss the boy. Better yet, he got to take him home.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks SO MUCH to silvermittt, who had to put up with my very slowly progress and who probably had to work on nothing but bare snippets and the story’s timeline. She’s a trooper, I’m telling you! I was so happy when I heard that I get to collaborate with her on this BB because I fell in love with her with her art months ago. She’s also doing illustrations for two other stories so you guys should go check those out too!
> 
> I’d like to thank wook77 for volunteering to beta this thing and also cheerleadering, even though she's an evil, evil enabler. Honestly, I don’t think I would’ve made it this far if not for her encouragements (which means you guys have her to blame for this thing). You have her to thank for Shepard’s sexy, sexy poem which I shamelessly stole (she knows, don’t worry). She’s also responsible for Kaidan’s description of Shepard’s ass and for that, I will be forever grateful. ;P
> 
> Special thanks to G, who played all three Mass Effect games while I struggled with this. Her utterly hilarious commentary as she finished ME1 & 2, as well as most of 3 was just the distraction I needed from the writing process. Also to Lee, who’ll never read this, but thanks anyway.


End file.
